Choices
by mipela
Summary: Things have moved on for Kate since the weekend away. She desperately needs some peace and healing. Has she found the right person to offer her that?
1. Chapter 1

_Could Kate really move on from the events of her birthday weekend? As usual all comments and suggestions are most welcome. I have been very humbled by your support for my other stories. Thank you._

 **Choices**

Kate put her coffee down in response to a knock at the door. As she reached the glass panel she could see a familiar figure standing, waiting.

"I just came to say thank you" Caroline said as she handed Kate a beautiful bunch of flowers.

"You didn't have to do that." Inside the thought was 'I wish you hadn't; it's too hard to have you standing on my doorstep; too many memories, too much pain, wanting, yearning and now nothing, just numbness'.

"Can I come in?"

What to do; hesitate, try to find the answer quickly.

"I can say it on the doorstep."

Decency , manners Kate; don't be childish.

"No, come in, come in."

Caroline breathed in the familiar atmosphere, the simple elegance of the cottage, the familiar smells. The memories came flooding back; it was their refuge, the only place they could ever guarantee they could be completely alone. It was in this sanctuary they first explored each other and gave way to the desires they had harboured for so long.

Kate motioned for her to sit down.

"How is your pregnancy going, Kate. Have you got a birthing partner?"

"My mum said she would, if I needed someone."

"What about Greg?"

"No he really never was part of the equation beyond." She cut the sentence short as her hand swept protectively across her now swelling belly.

"Anyone else?"

"Maybe."

Caroline could feel her heart miss a beat and her stomach start to turn itself into knots. She had no idea what to say.

Kate was just about to cut into the long silence that followed her statement when they both heard a key in the lock.

"Katie darling, I'm home, where are you."

Caroline froze to her seat.

A few moments later a thirty-something woman floated into the sitting room dressed in medical scrubs. She walked straight over to Kate and leaned in giving her a short but passionate kiss. Caroline watched; riveted to Kate's lips. The kiss was definitely reciprocated; accompanied by a softening of her face, which spoke a thousand words.

"Caroline, this is Isabelle."

"Oh please call me Issy, everyone else does. I've heard a lot about you Caroline. It's lovely to meet you in person." She extended a hand and warmly took Caroline's into hers.

"Please excuse my attire. I've just finished a long overnight fourteen hour stint. I'm in need of a hot bath and bed."

Caroline was stunned by the warmth and sincerity of the words and the handshake.

"Nice to meet you too. I won't stay as you two obviously need to catch up." She couldn't wait to get out; the shock was almost too much to bear.

"Oh no don't leave on my account. You and Katie should carry on. Can I make you a cup of tea before I slip upstairs and have a bath? Lots of baby smells from last night to wash away" she chuckled.

As she left the room to put the kettle on, Kate smiled at Caroline and said softly, "She's a paediatric registrar at St Margaret's. She works very long hours as you can imagine."

"How long have you err been" she couldn't get the rest of the sentence out.

Coming to her rescue, Kate said, "Nearly three months now. I had to have some special tests; being over forty and my first pregnancy. I slipped into the hospital cafe afterwards and Issy asked if she could share my table. We just got talking, and the rest is, well."

"Wow, that's quick."

"As it turns out she was looking for a place to rent a room as she was not enjoying the shared flat she was in. I needed some company and so it works well."

"Oh, so you're not in a," again Caroline couldn't get the words out.

"Yes we are, but we are taking it slowly. Issy works long hours and still has a lot of study as her finals are coming up soon. It suits us both."

"Right, right, I see."

"Caroline, you implied you have something you wanted to talk about when you asked to come in. What is it" Kate asked gently.

"Oh, oh, it's nothing. In fact it's quite redundant now. I'd better be going anyway as I need to go home and make sure Lawrence is OK."

She left the house and could barely walk to the car. Her feet felt like lead. Her head was pounding. Within seconds of closing the car door she began to sob uncontrollably. It took her some time to calm down enough to even think of driving home.

Kate stood at the window watching; feeling the pain searing her being as she saw Caroline crying.

Issy came up quietly behind her and put her arms around Kate's waist. "That was really difficult wasn't it?"

She knew only too well that the reason her Katie was 'taking things slowly' was because of the woman who had just been in their sitting room. Kate had been a mess when she first moved in. Once their relationship had started albeit in a very tentative way, she had told her everything about her relationship with Caroline and the roller coaster they had been on. Issy could understand it but not really empathise too much. Studying medicine had mostly been her whole life and any relationships she had, purely transitory. There had never seemed enough time to get too deeply involved.

This time was different. She could hardly breathe the first time Kate had kissed her. It was like nothing she had ever felt before, and it scared her.

Caroline pulled up outside her house. Somehow she had to pull herself together and get inside to be with her son. God knows he had suffered enough the previous night and had it not been for Kate it may well have been a much worse outcome. 'Kate'. She could barely think the name let alone say it.

Once she had spent some time with Lawrence and he was settled in front of the television, she escaped to her bedroom. Lying on the bed, it was as if all hope had been extinguished; like someone had burst a balloon she had carefully blown up ready to hand over in reconciliation. It was over. Done. Kate had moved on. Her worst fears realised.

Kate lay on her bed too; she however was in Issy's arms. They would often spend time together after a long night shift, it helped Issy to calm down before trying to sleep a few hours. Kate loved the warmth and security it brought her. It was healing her slowly, she knew that. Today was different. Issy had loved her with a desire and passion she had not felt before and she knew why. Kate looked at her lover as she held her, and thought, 'I can't hurt her, I mustn't '.

Her eyes drifted to the ceiling and she remembered in mind and body the days and nights she lay here with Caroline. There was no comparison.

Monday morning arrived and as she drove to Sulgrave, Caroline wondered how she would cope if she laid eyes on Kate. 'Katie', what was that? She was her Kate. So many questions; no right to ask them.

Kate was tortured as she drove to school. She had witnessed the pain and grief Caroline, her Caroline, had shown as she sat in the car outside the cottage. What to do. Talk to her, not talk to her. Issy had noticed her retreating in to herself over the weekend.

"Katie, you need to sort this out; for my sake, your sake and by the looks of it the other day, Caroline's."

Morning assembly started and as Kate played the organ, she watched Caroline strut down the aisle towards the stage. She had seen this hundreds of times. Today she could hardly bear to look, but not looking was impossible. Caroline stared up at the organ briefly and their eyes locked for a nano-second. It was electric.

Assembly finished and Kate packed away the music. She had a free period first off and being on her own in this organ space was just what she needed.

Footsteps; she heard the distinct click clack of Caroline's heels; getting closer. Her heart started to beat so hard she could barely suck in enough oxygen.

"Kate, I'm sorry to intrude but we can't really avoid each other and so I was wondering if you felt it would be better to clear the air?"

"I don't think I can do it at this moment Caroline. I need to be on my game for class. Issy is on an afternoon shift today. I could stay after school if that's OK with you?"

'Issy' Caroline thought. 'Do I ever want to hear that name again'?

"Er yes that will be fine. Shall we say four o clock?"

"Yes but neutral territory Caroline. Not your office." Too often she kept a desk between her and Kate at school and that would not do today.

"Ok. Coffee shop, or pub?"

"Coffee shop, our usual; I'll meet you there."

Did she really just say that?' Our usual'. She was astonished at how quickly and naturally that came out.

The hours passed slowly for both women. Neither really sure what and how they were going to say what needed to be said.

As Kate sat at her desk in the lunch break, her phone pinged; a message.

'Katie, I love you. Issy xx'

Kate felt an overwhelming sadness come over her. This was for sure a no win situation.

Caroline pulled up outside the coffee shop and was immediately drawn to the sight of Kate sitting at a window table. She looked deep in thought.

'I've got one chance at this, just one, get it right this time.' Caroline told herself as she slipped out of the seat belt and opened the door. Kate noticed the movement and gave her a small wave and smile.

After ordering, they both sat in silence, just looking deeply into each other's eyes.

Caroline broke the silence. "Kate, I did come to tell you something the other day. I realised over the weekend while at Gillian's that I had lost something very precious. I could see clearly how and why that happened. I don't blame you at all. It's all down to my fears, inadequacies and inability to show my feelings. I came to ask for the last time, for another chance."

Kate's eyes welled up with tears. She took a moment to compose herself.

"It's complicated Caroline. You must see that now."

"If it were just about me and Issy, then I it would be a straight choice; but it isn't just about Issy. There's your mother, John, the boys. It's like a whirlwind. There's so little peace a lot of the time. I'm having a baby Caroline; I need to have a quiet, loving home for it. There has to be stability and acceptance. Your home is sometimes so full of venom I can hardly bear to be there myself, let alone a new baby."

Steeling herself against an argument, Caroline responded, "I know. I'm a coward. I told you that at the hotel. I just don't deal with things. There's a lot of baggage, I know that."

"Being with Issy these past few months has been so different. She's uncomplicated, gentle, open and proud to be with me. Her family are welcoming, happy people."

Caroline was at last faced with her inability to stand up for what she truly wanted. Stand up for her Kate. She too felt she was living in a whirlwind a lot of the time. However every time she rallied herself to face the battles, she always found a reason to pull back.

"But she's not you Caroline."

Caroline reached over and put her hand over Kate's; who immediately pulled away. "That's not an option Caroline. I started a relationship with Issy because I really believed you and I were over. I won't ever give her cause to doubt me. It's all or nothing you know that about me.

Before you say anything, Greg was different. If you had not treated me the way you did that weekend, I would never have slept with him without us both being OK with it. You forced my hand."

"Then you must tell me what to do now. I've put my cards on the table and told you I want you back. The decision is yours."

"No Caroline; putting your cards on the table is not the same as making choices about what you have to do to win the hand. "

Kate too had a very difficult choice to make.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

 ** _Thank you for your feedback, always welcome. I know this is hard for some to read. It's hard to write in some ways but it also feels like the conversations they really needed to have._**

Life at Sulgrave had swept the two women back into the reality of the everyday. They smiled if they met on the corridor or in meetings but there was no more mention of their recent conversation.

Caroline found herself writing endless lists; 'what to do'; 'pros and cons'. All of them showed without doubt that a life with Kate is what she wanted most in the world. They also confronted her. She knew that there were huge choices to be made and implementing them was going to be the greatest challenge of her life.

Kate too had a very big dilemma. Seeing Caroline in her home again had her in ever spiralling circles. One the one hand she knew that Caroline was the love of her life; of that there was no doubt. n the other, she had Issy. When they were together in her house she felt safe and secure; no ranting ex-husbands; no son staring at you like you were dirt under his feet; no potential mother-in-law who thought you were 'just out for promotion'.

One thing Issy and she had never spoken of was the pregnancy, other than whether all was going well. Kate had never brought it up. It was too big a leap, even without Caroline in the picture. She kept coming back to the fact that she had only allowed herself to think seriously of having a baby because she thought she and Caroline would be its parents. It was far too early to be contemplating raising her child with someone else.

Friday came around and just after lunch, Kate received a text. It was from Caroline.

'Can we talk? If so when? C'

Kate stared at the phone and found it difficult to decide whether or not to say yes. She wanted to that was for sure. Issy was on duty most of the weekend and so in fact she had time; did she have the nerve; was she sure she could handle things?

'I can do Saturday lunch', she typed quickly before changing her mind.

'Great. Pick you up at 12'?

'No. Meet me at The Hare and Hounds at 12.30'. She did not want Caroline at the house again just yet.

Kate poured Issy a glass of wine and opened the take-away meal they had just had delivered. Most Fridays this was their routine, if she was not on duty. Pyjamas, take away, and some good television, curled up together on the lounge. Tonight there was tension in the air. They could both feel it.

"Issy, I've tentatively arranged to have lunch with Caroline tomorrow; are you OK with that?"

"Not really, but I suppose I need to be grown up about it."

They both ate in silence for a while. Kate almost unable to swallow what was in her mouth.

"What's really going on here Katie? Should I be worried?"

"I don't know is the honest answer. When we went for coffee last week, Caroline made it clear that she had come to the house to ask me to take her back; give her another chance. She had no idea you were in the picture."

"Do you want her back?"

Here it was, the moment of truth for Kate. She was going to have to choose; imminently.

Friday nights were a non-event for Caroline these days. More often than not, Lawrence was either with his father or out with Angus. So, for her it was just the TV or a good book, and at least half a bottle of wine. She had little appetite and only cooked for the sake of her son. Curled up on the lounge her thoughts drifted to Kate and the choices she had been challenged to make.

The house; Kate said it wasn't a place of peace; she was right, often it wasn't. She recalled her insensitive comments about the house when their relationship was on a knife edge, that birthday weekend. How could Kate not believe the house was more important than her; stupid, stupid comments.

Her mind drifted to all the upset that Kate had witnessed or heard about; the screaming matches, the snide comments, the insults; of course she wouldn't want a child in that kind of environment.

She sighed. It was all too much to think of tonight. However, she soon found that sleeping was not an option either; so much turmoil.

Here it was twelve thirty and she was in the pub waiting for her Kate to arrive. 'Her Kate' it just played over and over in her head like a song on a loop. She had taken her time getting ready, wanting to look her best while not overdoing it, but had arrived much earlier than she needed to; her stomach in knots, her head buzzing.

A few moments later, the familiar green Fiat pulled into the car park and the most beautiful woman in the world, as far as she was concerned, gently eased her now swelling body out of the door. The sight of her took Caroline's breath away.

As Kate walked towards her, she wondered if she dare try to hug her. It was not to be; Kate side stepped her and sat down at the table.

"How are you Caroline?"

"Churned up, as you would expect, I suppose is the best way to describe it."

"I can understand that. I'm not overly calm myself"

They ordered a light lunch and a drink; both of them aware there would need to be some serious conversation.

"Caroline, Issy knows that there is something happening. She's a smart woman and nobody's fool. She knows I am with you today and isn't totally comfortable with it but is hoping that she will get some clarification when we next talk."

"Oh God Kate, I can only imagine how difficult this must be for you. She's obviously very fond of you."

"Fond of me," Kate almost spat back. "She loves me. She wants the option of a future with me, let's stop using understatements, please!"

Caroline recoiled. How many times had she understated her feelings for Kate; I'm very fond of you; we had something nice; God, it was pathetic. It had taken her months to say 'I love you' even when they were in the throes of the most passionate love-making.

"When I am with Issy, my world is peaceful and gentle. I feel as if I am in control of myself; I feel equal and that my needs and are as important. We look after each other. But, as I said to you the other day; she's not you.

You and I are passionate together; you bring me to life, body and soul like no-one ever has or will. I was totally in love with you; but it's like navigating an ever moving obstacle course and it's exhausting emotionally. The only time I ever felt really at peace and safe was in my house, in bed with little chance of anyone disturbing us. Even then your phone was constantly on alert."

"Kate, to be fair, I have to be available for my children and mother; I think that's a bit harsh."

"Yes, OK I understand that. But I don't understand you answering a call from John when we are lying in bed together. That's really quite sick in my opinion."

Caroline put her head in her hands and stared at the table. God it was all such a mess.

After a few moments she said, "How would you feel if I tried to buy John out of the house straight away, for good; get rid of him."

"How would you feel Caroline if I said to you that I would like you to sell the house, give John his share and then move into something completely new; our home, no memories of him, no access for him, no sense of entitlement?"

Caroline opened her mouth and then shut it again. She knew she would only come out with the same old statements, 'I can't sell it; I've put so much into it; there's my mother; there's the boys'; and she knew it would not go down well.

"Big choice, big challenge isn't it Caroline?"

Kate could see her struggling to hold back the tears. It was impossible to watch. She stretched her hand across the table and held Caroline's; who gripped it like she would never let it go.

"Remember the day in your garden when I told you that Richard and I had been forced to sell our beautiful home; I said it was heartbreaking."

"Yes I do."

Kate chose her words carefully, she didn't want to sound like she was threatening Caroline, "What would be worse darling, the heartbreak of losing bricks and mortar or losing each other?"

'Darling'; Oh God did I really say that.

"Am I still your darling, Kate?"

"I can't go there now Caroline. It came out; it must have come from somewhere so take it as you will."

"Issy has her final exams next month. I would never forgive myself if I upset her or her living arrangements before then. You can understand that can't you?"

"Yes I can understand Kate. Take the time you need to make your choice. I have no right to push you. But I have to say, I think we both know what outcome we want. I think it's the same."

Kate let go of Caroline's hand and she felt the loss immediately.

"I have a suggestion to make. Let's see where we both are in a month. You focus on looking after Issy until she has finished her exams and I will try to get my head around all the things I need to face up to."

They agreed that this was a way forward for now. They ate their lunch, trying hard to talk about other more general things. Caroline was keen to hear about the special pregnancy tests that Kate had been through and what the results were. All good; thank God for that.

An hour later they got up to leave the restaurant. Caroline walked over to Kate's car with her. They stood face to face, both knowing that all they wanted to do was drive home together,get into bed and shut the world out for the rest of the weekend. It couldn't happen; they had to be content with a light kiss on the cheek. She knew Kate would never move further until she had resolved her feelings about being with Issy; the thought of her in bed with this other woman, probably that night, made Caroline feel physically sick.

That afternoon she picked up her phone. "John, this is Caroline. I'm fine thanks. We need to talk. I want to put the house on the market soon. I don't want to buy you out as I said before. I want to move somewhere else."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

Kate lay in bed. Sleep was impossible. Issy had just sent a text to say that she would not be home before two or three and for Kate to go to bed and not wait up. This was a reprieve for her. Issy would sleep in her own room tonight and Kate would be spared the nightmare of having to say no to any possibility of love making.

She had spent most of the afternoon going over the conversation with Caroline. Being with her, even in a public place and for such a short time, had confirmed for her that she could no longer continue to give Issy hope for the future. Even if things didn't work out with Caroline, Issy was worth more than second best and that is what she would always be.

Her thoughts turned to the days and nights of love here with her Caroline. The passion; the way they would lose themselves in each other; the feel of her body; the tastes; the delicious smell of her favourite perfume. He body stirred at the mere thought of it all and she felt such a deep longing.

Caroline sat on her lounge feeling like she had been punched in the stomach by a professional boxer. During the evening she had summoned up the courage to talk with her mother and Alan.

"Mum, I need to talk to you about the house."

"Oh have you managed to scrape together the money to buy John out at last?"

"No mum, I've changed my mind. I don't want to buy John out, I want to sell up and move to a new house somewhere."

"Sell up and move! What about Alan and me? What about the boys? Where is all this coming from Caroline?"

"I need a new start mum now that my divorce has come through. John still regards this as his home and he refuses to move out completely. I don't want to be confronted with him all the time. William will probably never come back permanently and Lawrence will go away in a couple of years. Lots of kids have to deal with their parents moving house."

"Well, what about me?"

"If you were still on your own mum, I would have to consider things differently. You have Alan now and in fact you have already talked about buying a bungalow. If I sell up I can give you the money back that you put in to here. That should help with a new house."

At this point Alan joined in, "It's alright Celia, the lass needs to start afresh. We can look for somewhere and we always have a home at the farm if we want. We could even build an extension there."

"Caroline! I know you. I am your mother after all. What is going on?"

Caroline sighed and looked at the floor. This was one of the challenges she knew was going to be horrendous. Celia was supportive when she told her that Kate had left her, but she had made many comments since then to the effect that Caroline would be 'better off' and her life could get 'back to normal'. She had been too emotionally crushed to argue.

"Mum, I've asked, no pleaded with Kate to give me another chance. I'm so unhappy without her. I know she feels the same way, but there are many changes that we both need to make if it is going to work."

"Oh Caroline, don't be such a fool. Why open all that up again. You seem to be getting on with things."

"Getting on isn't the same as living mum. I want to be with her. I need her. I'm in love with her. I can't say it any clearer than that. I treated her quite badly a lot of the time. I didn't stand up for her, for us. Some of the things this family has put her through are just plain wrong. She didn't deserve it."

"What things! I don't know what you're talking about."

"Celia, please, don't do this. Caroline has told us how she feels and we have to respect that. I've seen and heard some of the things she's talking about and you know how much it upset me, let alone poor Kate." Alan levelled at his wife.

"Well, if you want to choose her above your family, that's up to you. We'll start packing and move to the farm where we know we're wanted." With that Celia marched out of the room. Poor Alan squeezed Caroline's hand and followed her.

Sitting alone, she wondered how much more despondent she could be. The only person who could make her feel better was her Kate and she wished with all her heart she could at least ring her. She looked at the time, half past ten. Far too late to ring and anyway she may be...; O God that was impossible to even contemplate. She just wanted those familiar arms around her. Kate always soothed away her troubles and upsets and put as positive a spin on things as possible.

Eventually she took herself to bed and waited for sleep to come. She stretched her arm across the bed and stroked the place where Kate would be. She could feel her, smell her and her body moved as if to blend with hers; how long she wondered; how long before she is here where she should be.

The sun streamed into Kate's bedroom through the partially open curtains. She looked at her watch; eight o clock. She pulled herself out of bed and put on a dressing gown, making her way down to the kitchen. As she passed the sitting room she noticed Issy asleep on the lounge. Moments later as she put the kettle on she heard. "Katie, is that you?"

"Yep, I'm just making some coffee, would you like some?"

"Please, then can you come here for a while?"

Coming back into the sitting room, Kate noticed the tear stained face; her worst fears were about to hit her. It was all going to come to a head. Issy beckoned for her to come and sit beside her.

"Haven't you been to bed at all?" Kate enquired.

"Nope, I think I've dozed a bit but I wanted to be here when you got up. We need to talk Katie. I can't wait any longer. But I'm asking that you let me speak first as I think you will find it easier."

Kate settled beside her, giving her a tender good morning kiss. It seemed the least she could do in view of what she suspected was to come.

"I'm not stupid right? So I know a woman in love when I see one and I see one here beside me. Unfortunately for me, I am not the recipient of that love. Oh I know you love me in a caring and gentle kind of way but it isn't the passion you have for Caroline."

Kate let her gaze drop from Issy's face. There was no point in trying to pretend it wasn't true.

"Issy, I..."

"No Katie don't interrupt. You are an amazing woman; so very beautiful and even if we had just remained friends, as we started out, I would count myself lucky. But, I have been blessed by having a short but none the less wonderful chance to be close to you. I have fallen a little bit in love with you. I even allowed myself to think you could be the one.

But there are two obstacles to that. One is Caroline. She is the one. We both know that. She leaves a lot to be desired in some ways, going by what you have shared, but she obviously adores you.

The second, and I have to say, more important obstacle is that I have been offered a junior consultancy at Great Ormond Street Hospital. Like just the best children's hospital in Europe! I can't pass that up Katie, not even for you."

"Issy, that's fantastic! O God I am so proud of you." Kate grabbed her and held her in a tight hug. Issy kissed her but then let go. "How long ago did they tell you this?"

"Last week, the day I came home and Caroline was here. I didn't tell you then as the moment would have been lost I fear. I have been waiting to see how things would go with the two of you. I knew I couldn't ask you to re-locate to London with me if you were still unsure of Caroline. Then there's the baby. That's another story. One we've never discussed."

Issy filled up with tears as she looked at Kate. She knew Kate was excited for her but she also saw the relief that flooded over her face. She would not tell her Katie just what this was costing her. When she heard the news her first thought had been that they could go to London together, a new start for her broken-hearted lover; a new baby together; a new life, but once she saw Caroline at the house she knew it would be over. She loved Kate too much to put her through even more hell and so she decided not to share her plans.

"Issy, now it's my turn. You know that you saved me. I was such a mess when we met. Life was utterly miserable and I didn't know how I would get through it all. You came along and from the moment you moved in I started to heal. I really do love you; but as you rightly said it is a gentle and caring love. I don't regret one moment of it, including our love making. It was right for both of us, for different reasons.

You too are beautiful Issy and you deserve to be loved by someone who wants only you. I can't be that person, you know that and I respect and love you too much to pretend.

I have no idea if Caroline and I will really get back together; there's a lot to work out.

This chance at the hospital is wonderful. I can't tell you how happy and proud I feel."

Issy sobbed into her shoulder. "Katie, I love you and the thought of leaving you is killing me; but I really think this is the best outcome. At least I can focus on my new career."

They sat quietly together letting it all sink in. True, Kate did feel some relief and yet the prospect of the hurt Issy may go through was very painful. The last thing she would ever want is to hurt this wonderful woman. Damn Caroline. If she hadn't been such a coward none of this would have happened; just another Elliott disaster.

'Come on Katherine McKenzie, that's not fair. You dumped her. She didn't force you to get close to Issy.' She was ashamed of the angry thoughts against her. She knew that Caroline had suffered immensely since she had walked out on her. God there was so much to sort out.

Kate was jolted out of her reverie.

"Is there the slightest chance we could make love Katie, one last time?"


	4. Chapter 4

**Choices Chapter Four**

 _ **I hope this chapter will help with some of the angst that's been flying around. But remember 'It's not over until the fat lady sings!' my friends.**_

Kate took Issy's face into her hands and kissed her as gently and tenderly as she could.

"No, Issy, there isn't a chance. Let's remember the last time we were together, the night Caroline had been here. You were so beautiful, passionate and giving. It was very special. If we were to try now, well, there's too much agenda."

"But Katie, I..."

"Shush, come here and lie in my arms. Let me hold you and tell you how wonderful you are; how much you have healed me; even though you've only been in my life for a few months, I will never regret or forget you. You are amazing."

Issy lay alongside Kate and held her tightly.

"Please let me look after you until your exams are over. Then I'll come to London with you and help you find a place to live; I can picture where you are then."

"Katie, I'm not going to stay here for my exams. I've arranged to sit them in London. I have an old medical school friend Jimmy, and I will share a flat with him and if it works out, I'll stay on after I start work."

"Oh Issy, I'm worried that all this has blown up at the wrong time for you. I didn't want anything to interfere with the exams. Caroline and I even made a deal not to see each other so that we could both be where we needed to be for the time being."

"It's OK Katie, I feel confident about them and if I make the break now, it will be less of a distraction. I think being under the same roof would be far too painful, for both of us.

I've told them at the hospital that Wednesday morning will be my last shift. I'll take Thursday to get ready and my brother will come and take me to London on Friday."

Kate kissed her forehead and she felt Issy relax; a few moments later, she was asleep.

As she lay, stroking Issy's head, it began to sink in; the enormity of the choice she had just made; she felt a fluttering of fear. This woman was a gift from the heavens, smart, gentle, loving and would be totally committed to her. She had no baggage; she was almost perfect. What if it didn't work out for her and Caroline; what if the right choices hadn't been made?

Then she thought of her Caroline. Somehow, despite all the mess and mayhem they had been through, their love was so powerful it was hard to describe. It would work; it had to.

Caroline wandered into the kitchen still in her pyjamas and found Lawrence at the bench having his breakfast. "Morning love," she said as she ruffled his hair.

"Ma, there's a bloke out there hammering something into the garden near the gate."

"What bloke?'

"I don't know, but it looks like some kind of sign."

Suddenly it dawned on her. She had been to the real estate agent during the week and asked him to put the house on the market. He must be putting up the 'For Sale' sign. She panicked. She had not spoken to Lawrence about her plans; the time had never been right.

"Lawrence, we need to talk, there's something I need to tell you."

'What Ma?"

"The man outside is putting up a for sale sign. We are selling the house. Your father and I are divorced now and so it's time we went our separate ways."

"But you said you were going to buy Dad out and we would all stay here; why have you changed your mind? Does that mean we'll have to move out?"

"Yes, it does Lawrence. I'm sorry, but I need a new start. Your father will insist on still having a right to be here whenever he pleases and I don't want to live like that."

"But what about me, where will I go?"

"Well, I err we'll buy a new house, your father will buy somewhere and then you will be able to spend time with both of us. I would want you with me most of the time of course, but your dad will want you too."

"Where will Granny and Alan go?"

"They may buy a new house or live at the farm with Gillian. I'm not sure. Just be aware that Granny isn't happy and is on the warpath."

Lawrence almost threw his bowl into the sink and left the room, shouting back as he did, "She's not the only one!"

This was the last of the 'big announcements' but by far the one she had been dreading the most. Her mother would come round eventually, she didn't care what John thought, but her baby boy, that was different. He was still just a kid and what she was asking him to accept was far more than just a new house, even though he didn't know that yet.

'O God Kate, I really need to speak to you, I can't manage all this on my own; I'm terrified I will just push the 'too hard' button and relapse into my comfort zone'.

She poured herself a cup of tea and sat silently mulling over everything as she drank it. 'Would it really be so wrong to try to ring Kate; would she feel like I was pushing her too fast; would she even answer and if she didn't wouldn't she feel worse?'

Kate had persuaded Issy to go to bed after a while. She lay on the bed with her until she fell asleep again. They had made a deal to go out for dinner together that evening. Kate was going to treat her to a very special meal; it was their last chance before Issy left.

She wandered around the kitchen with her phone in her hand. She was almost desperate to tell Caroline of Issy's decision, but wanted to stay true to her word; she didn't want to risk Issy finding out and thinking that she couldn't wait to get rid of her; anyway that wasn't true.

Suddenly her phone alerted her to a message. 'I really want to talk to you. C x'

Kate thought for a few moments and then against everything her heart was crying out for, she replied, 'not until Friday' K x'

Caroline threw the phone on to the bench. 'God Kate; why do you always have to be so bloody 'holier than thou!'

Beverley came in to Caroline's office first thing Monday morning, "Caroline, Kate's just seen me to ask if you could let her have Thursday afternoon and Friday off for personal leave?"

"What, err sorry, why is she asking you to ask me?"

"I think she was in a hurry to get to class."

"Well, did she say what the personal leave was about; is she OK?"

"No she didn't. I didn't like to ask. What she I tell her?"

"Oh, just give her the leave form and tell her it's OK. If I see her I'll ask." She knew the last remark wasn't true. If Kate had not come to ask her personally, something must be happening.

Kate and Issy had enjoyed their meal out together. They had talked a lot about their respective futures. Issy had been very insistent that once she got settled in London, and felt she was over her love affair with Kate, she wanted them to still be friends. "It's how we started Katie, and we are good friends, good for each other."

Kate had agreed. She really did think that they would be good friends. But, it would always be Issy's choice; she would wait and see how it went for her. She felt she had no right to any expectations. Even though it had occurred to her that Caroline may not like that idea; she had dismissed it immediately; Caroline and she would have to trust each other and allow the other to live their life.

That night they kissed each other as they separated at their respective bedroom doors. Moments later she heard muffled sobs coming from Issy's room. As she lay alone, Kate could feel the tears sliding down the side of her cheeks. This moment had to be close to hell.

On Wednesday morning, Beverley stepped in to the office, "Caroline, there's a Dr Isabelle Chiller on the phone for you. She wasn't keen to tell me what it was about. Shall I put her through?" Caroline took several seconds to connect Issy to the name she had just been given. "Yes, I know who she is, put her through Beverley, thanks."

"Issy, this is Caroline, how are you?" "Oh not too bad, under the circumstances Caroline; I was wondering if you might have a few minutes spare at lunchtime today. I'd like to have a chat if you are up for it"

Caroline was rather taken aback but she gathered herself quickly, "Yes I could do that. I can be free by 12.30 if that's convenient."

"Yes that would be great. I promise not to take up too much of your time; you must be very busy in your position."

"That's OK. I'll look forward to seeing you."

Four hours later, there was a knock at her door and Beverley ushered Dr Isabelle Chiller in. Caroline stopped in her tracks. Last time she saw this woman she was in stained medical scrubs, her hair was pulled back and she looked tired and drawn.

The woman who stood there now was stunning. Tall and slim like her Kate; beautiful brown eyes that sparkled with life; thick long auburn hair. She wore long black pants and a beautiful pink shirt, the buttons of which were open enough to reveal the top of her breasts. Her perfume drifted across to Caroline and it was delicious. Her make-up was discrete but it highlighted her beautiful bone structure.

Caroline came round to the other side of the desk, shook hands with Issy and motioned for her to sit down. She was mesmerised. She had never pictured her as being so attractive.

"Caroline, thank you for seeing me. Katie, err Kate, sorry, would be upset if she thought I was here. I hope you won't mention this to her just yet."

"No of course not, if that's what you want."

"May I speak to you openly and frankly? You hardly know me and it is rather an ambush situation?"

"No, no of course, go ahead, I'll be OK."

"You know how we met; Kate asked me if I would like to move in to her spare room. I had shared with her that the flat I was in was like a frat house and I couldn't see myself being able to study there. She kindly offered. At first we barely saw each other, but little by little we found we liked spending time with each other. It was all above board, just friends. We talked a lot when we had time and she slowly trusted me and shared her pain and loss. I'd never been in that situation. The life of a young medic is a lot of hard work, study and sex."

Caroline found herself grinning as she warmed to this woman.

"I began to fall in love with Kate. She is so beautiful; so warm; so generous. It took her a long time to allow me to love her. However I know that I helped her to trust again and to heal her broken heart."

Caroline began to cry and asked for a moment to compose herself. "I suppose she told you what happened?"

"Yes she did. But you know Caroline amid all the tears and pain she always spoke of you with the greatest respect, even in the stories of your, if you don't mind me saying it, dysfunctional family. I think I would have killed you! Or at least one of them."

Caroline looked down to the carpet. She felt so ashamed. A grown woman allowing all that baggage to damage the woman she loved so much.

"I didn't protect her and for that I will always be ashamed. She is everything you say and more and I didn't take care of her." Caroline shared through her tears.

"Well Caroline, I came to tell you that I am leaving Harrogate. I had been offered a position at Great Ormond Street even before you came to visit Kate, but I hadn't told her yet. I was trying to work out whether I could expect her to move to London with me. I'm leaving on Friday. It's better for both of us if I leave now."

Before she could stop herself, Caroline whispered, "Does that mean...?"

"I can't answer that Caroline, only Kate knows whether you two have a future together. But I do want to ask you not to hurt her again. If she does want you two to get back together, please don't let her down. She loves me, I know that, but it is nothing to the love she has for you. I myself have never seen or experienced anything like it. It's a rare treasure. You must be very special yourself to have her by your side."

Caroline was completely bowled over by the sincere and selfless way Issy was talking to her. No wonder Kate loved her.

"I promise you that if she does decide to give me a chance I will never let her down again. I'll look after her and protect her from all the rubbish that goes on in my family. She will always come first. I love her so much Issy. I've waited for years to find the right person to be myself with."

"OK I hold you to that Caroline. I have to go now. They have organised a little farewell for me on the children's ward. Lots of sticky cakes and sweets no doubt." she laughed.

"Kate is quite fragile this week Caroline. I think she is feeling my pain nearly as much as me. Just give her space and time and I'm sure she'll come to you as soon as she's ready.

Bye and Good Luck. Maybe we'll meet again in different circumstances." Dr Isabelle Chiller left her office and Caroline had the distinct feeling she would always be a better person for having met her.


	5. Chapter 5

**Choices Chapter Five**

 _ **Thanks again for you lovely reviews. It makes it worthwhile. There were tears in the writing, not too many in the reading I hope!**_

The rental van stood ominously outside Kate's house. Issy and Peter, her brother, were busy loading boxes and suitcases. They had refused to let Kate help in her 'delicate' state.

She was in the kitchen making the final preparations to the lunch she was packing for the journey. Her mind drifted to earlier. She had woken after a very short night, to find Issy beside her. As she stirred, and turned over their eyes met and Kate was confronted with a look of sadness she could never have imagined.

"When did you come in?"

"Oh about two hours ago; I couldn't sleep as you would expect and I climbed in beside you because I needed to hold you one last time. You're not angry with me?"

"God, of course not; come here." She pulled Issy into her arms, she realised how well their bodies fitted together, in such a comforting way.

"Katie, I just want to tell you that you have opened up a new world of love and commitment for me. You know that most of my relationships so far have been pretty shallow. God, I even had a fling with Jimmy, the guy I'm going to share with. That didn't last too long."

Kate was struck by the reaction she had to this revelation about Jimmy. Would Issy simply fall back into the arms of an old lover? Somehow she found that prospect impossible to contemplate.

"I know there will be someone out there for me. I'll find them eventually and I only hope we can love each other as much as you and Caroline do."

At that moment Peter walked into the kitchen. "We're just about ready to head off Kate. Can I just say how lovely it's been to get to know you. I'm sorry things haven't worked out for the two of you, sis is a little too focussed on her job I guess."

"Oh no, Peter, please don't think this is in any way Issy's fault. If there is any blame in this, it's mine. I'll leave her to tell you about it if she wants to. But you should know that she pulled me back from the brink of despair. She's wonderful and I will always love her."

Peter hugged Kate and nodded knowingly. "I'll text you when we get there."

"Thank you, it's been so lovely to get to know your family a little. It's obvious where Issy gets her goodness. Look after each other."

Kate thought her heart was going to break at that moment.

Issy walked back into the house, passing Peter in the hall on his way out. "Take your time sis. I'll wait in the van."

The moment they had both been dreading.

Kate stretched out her arms and folded Issy into them. "I love you, you know that don't you"

"Yes Katie. I know. I love you more than you can imagine, but I want you to be completely at peace and right now we both know there is something missing. Just promise me you will make sure the missing piece fits properly.

Please keep me in the loop with the baby."

"Of course I will, and I want to know how the exams are going."

"Yep ,OK. I'll call or text you as soon as I feel able; it may take me some time to stop missing you; to stop longing for you. Bye my darling Katie. Look after yourself." They kissed gently and Issy turned and walked out of the house.

After waving them off, Kate headed back into her sitting room. The house immediately felt cold and empty. She walked upstairs and opened the door to Issy's room; she told herself it was to check if anything had been left behind; who was she fooling; she could smell the familiar perfume, imagine her lying on the bed; the emptiness of the room was overwhelming. She felt the bile rising in her throat and she dashed to bathroom to throw up.

Caroline was finding it impossible to concentrate on anything on her desk. She was in a daze. All she could think of was her Kate and what the two women would be going through. She was desperate to put on her coat, pick up her keys and go to her.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the phone. She picked it up. 'John Calling'

'Jesus, what does he want. I'm not in the mood. However, true to form instead of pressing the decline button she answered, "Yes John."

"Caroline what the hell is going on? Lawrence told me there's a 'for sale' sign in the garden."

"Yes well that's what normally happens when you're selling a house" sarcasm oozing in her voice.

"I don't remember agreeing to that."

"Well you didn't disagree when I told you."

"No, because I didn't think you were serious."

"Well I am. Call my solicitor if you don't like it. I can't talk to you now." And with that she finished the call and threw her phone back on to the desk. Seconds later it rang; him again. This time she ignored it. An idea came into her head, "Beverley, do you know how to block a phone number on my type of mobile?" Through the intercom Beverley said she could. She wandered into Caroline's office who simply handed the phone to her and said "Block John for me please."

Beverley looked quizzical but then she had noticed how distracted Caroline was today and so she asked no questions.

Peter drove in silence with his sister. She was deep in thought and every now a then a sideways glance would show him a tear running down her face. After an hour or so he said gently,"Are you OK sis?"

"Yep, I will be soon. I just need to pull myself together."

"If you look in the glove box, there's something there for you, Kate put it in when I was packing."

Issy opened the compartment and found a box with a ribbon around it and a card. She opened the box and found a beautiful white and yellow gold bracelet. The two colours twisted through each other. It was gorgeous. Shaky hands grappled with the envelope and at last she pulled out the card.

'I hope this bracelet is perfect for you. It shows our two lives and how they have been intertwined by fate. It's not possible to separate them if the bracelet is to remain whole. We are both stronger, better people because we have shared our lives, even for a short time.

Love always,

Katie xx'

Issy put the bracelet on and promised herself that she would not take it off until she was over her Katie. It would give her strength and courage, and remind her that she was capable of loving someone deeply.

At three o'clock Caroline sent a text to Lawrence, 'Get the bus home or go to Angus's. See you later. Ma'

It was now impossible not to contact Kate. She knew the risk in going to the house, but she couldn't face a text telling her not to come or not to contact her. She grabbed her bag and coat and let Beverley know she was leaving for the weekend.

While driving, she told herself over and over, 'this is about Kate, no-one else; do not inject any of your own agenda Caroline'. She pulled up outside the house and with relief, saw Kate's car in the drive. Her heart was thumping as she reached the front door; she knew this could be a huge mistake.

Kate appeared at the door and Caroline was shocked to see how pale and drawn she looked; the bags under her eyes were something she had never seen before.

"Caroline, what are you doing here?" There was no tone in her voice, it was flat and lifeless.

"I err came to see if you're alright."

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Kate, I know that Issy left today."

"How, how could you know that?"

"Because she told me."

Kate looked puzzled and beckoned for Caroline to come inside. She offered her a chair and then sat down herself.

"What do you mean she told you?"

"She came to see me at school on Wednesday. That's when she told me she was leaving today. She wanted to tell me to look after you, not to hurt you ever again and how much she loved you. She also told me that you were pretty fragile."

Kate was numb. She didn't know what to say. The tears began again. Caroline reached out to touch her but she recoiled.

After what seemed like an age, Caroline got up and walked out into the kitchen. She came back after a few minutes with two cups of hot sweet tea. Kate took hers and managed a weak 'thank you'.

As Caroline sipped her tea trying not to stare directly at Kate, she was taken back to the day she left her at the hotel. 'If she feels anything like I did when I got home, God.' She thought.

Eventually Kate started to speak, "She left today, around one o'clock. Her brother is driving her down to London." She looked at the clock, "they should be well over half way there by now."

"Was it hard Kate?"

"Excruciating actually." The sadness in her voice bringing Caroline to tears.

"Is there anything I can do, or say to help?

"I don't think so right now. It all just has to sink in and settle down."

"Would you like me to go?"

"Yes if you don't mind. I can't really deal with anything today Caroline, but I am grateful for your thoughtfulness in coming round. I'll give you a ring when I feel a bit better and able to talk."

Caroline stood up to leave. "Can I hug you before I go, just for a little comfort?"

Kate stood up and walked over to her. She fell into Caroline's arms and wracking sobs overtook her. They stood together for what seemed like hours. Eventually Kate calmed down and lifted her face to Caroline, "I'm sorry, I was going to be so strong."

Caroline said nothing; she simply put her lips over Kate's and kissed her tenderly.

"Call me when you feel ready."


	6. Chapter 6

**Choices Chapter Six**

 _ **I hope this chapter relieves some our collective angst and offers a chink of sunlight to warm us up again. Thank you again for your wonderful encouragement.**_

Several weeks had passed since Caroline went to see Kate. They didn't avoid each other at school but neither did they seek each other out. Caroline watched from a distance, looking for signs that her Kate wasn't coping. However she seemed to be able to hold it together and Caroline was only too aware that she had placed the ball in Kate's court about when they would next talk.

She was walking up the stairs looking at a text that had just come in from the real estate agent about a potential buyer. "Caroline," she heard her secretary's familiar voice, "Kate's driven herself to hospital, she's bleeding. I didn't know if I should tell you or not."

"What! Which hospital is she at? I know, she'll have gone to St Margaret's." Nothing Beverley shouted after that hit Caroline's ears. She dashed to the car and sped away to the hospital.

As she walked into the antenatal unit, she saw the back of Kate, hunched in a chair waiting to be called. God, she looked tiny and frail and scared when Caroline finally sat beside her; she was visibly shaking and just holding it together.

Caroline tried to reassure her that this could be nothing, but she could tell that Kate's previous history was playing out like a movie in her head.

"Have you phoned your mum?"

"No, I don't want to worry her until we know something definite."

"What about Issy?

Kate turned to Caroline and looked intently at her for some moments. "No Caroline, Issy hasn't been in touch since she arrived in London other than a text to say that she got through her exams well."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I was just thinking with her being a doctor and all"

"She's a paediatrician Caroline not an obstetrician. Anyway she was never involved with anything to do with the baby."

"Kate McKenzie?" the radiographer called.

Kate picked up her cardigan and bag and began to walk away.

"Would you like me to come in with you?" A tentative but non- the- less sincere offer from Caroline; she knew how devastated Kate would be if this was bad news and she really wanted to be there for her.

Kate nodded and Caroline walked over and sat beside her in the room. As the gel was applied to Kate's stomach, a cold and sweaty hand reached out and took hers. She was glad to feel it and she put her other hand over the top, as if to warm it up.

The tension was unbearable, the 'beep beep' of the scanner but as yet no heartbeat. Caroline was glued to the screen. 'Please, please, come on a heartbeat, please; then, the familiar 'lub-dub, lub-dub'. It was like a symphony in her ears. She looked at Kate and saw a smile of relief as the nurse told her that everything was fine. It was a healthy little girl.

"Kate, let me take you home, you've had an awful scare. I may as well cancel the rest of my meetings for today. I'd really like to stay with you for a while until I know you're OK."

"I can't ask you to do that so close to the end of term Caroline, you must have all kinds of meetings to attend to."

"I don't care. I want to be with you."

Caroline followed Kate's car as they drove home to her cottage; then followed her into the house. Her eye was immediately drawn to a photograph she had never noticed there before. It was of Kate and Issy on the beach in Barcelona. They looked happy and carefree. She looked away quickly in case Kate saw her staring at it.

"Shall I make you a cup of tea or coffee?" she offered as Kate lowered herself on to the couch.

"Yes please, I'll have a coffee. Can you remember where everything is?"

"It's imprinted."

Kate smiled as she remembered Caroline's quick wit. It was comforting to have her here as she did feel a bit wobbly after the scare.

After they had both had their drinks, Caroline asked Kate if she wanted to rest. She nodded and lay on the couch. Caroline picked up a throw to put over her. As she went to cover her, Kate gently pulled Caroline down on to the couch. "Hold me please?"

Caroline felt her heart miss a beat. She threw off her shoes and jacket and lay down beside Kate and covered them both with the throw, putting her arms around her; pulling her gently into her own body. She kissed Kate's forehead and whispered, "Just relax now, I'm here, I have you."

Kate felt like she was safe again for the first time in weeks. Soon she was asleep. Caroline was glad to see her calm and relaxed. She began to stroke Kate's hair; God it felt good; she kissed the top of her head several times. Strangely, she wasn't aroused. She had always imagined the first time they were close she would be craving her body within seconds. This was different. The love she felt was protective, gentle and felt like it came from her soul.

They must have been there for a few hours; when Caroline opened her eyes, it was dark outside. Kate was still sound asleep.

"Kate, darling, wake up." Kate roused herself and seemed surprised momentarily to see Caroline lying beside her. Then she remembered.

"Goodness how long have I been asleep?"

"Oh, a good two or three hours; I fell asleep too. It must be after six as it is dark."

"Won't they be wondering where you are at home Caroline?"

"No, I sent a text to Lawrence after you went to sleep. He's fine; he's at Angus's for the night."

"May I kiss you Kate?" There was a hesitation and then Kate slowly lifted her face to Caroline's and their lips met. It was electric. Kate closed her eyes and heard; 'Katie, make sure the missing piece is the right fit.'

She was shocked and pulled away from Caroline. "I'm sorry Caroline. I don't think I'm ready for this yet."

"It's OK; don't worry. I can wait. What just spooked you?"

"It's something Issy said to me before she left. She told me that something was missing from my life, like a jigsaw, a piece that would complete it. She said it had to fit properly.

Caroline, we both know there are things, serious things to be worked out. I can't give in to my longing for you until I feel everything is right. You are the missing piece, you know that, but we have to be right."

"I know, I agree and I am taking steps to put things right, but I don't want to burden you with my stuff today. It's about you and this gorgeous little thing in here." She gently stroked Kate's tummy.

Kate was overwhelmed by Caroline's gentleness.

"Caroline,"

"Mm,"

"Would you stay tonight? I just want to be close to you."

"Of course I will. We'll take things as slowly as you want. First my girl, you are going to eat; you have a little one in there that needs her nourishment. I'll go and cook us something light. Why don't you have a nice warm bath?"

Kate walked into the kitchen in her pyjamas and already Caroline noticed a softening of the tension in her face.

They sat quietly eating the eggs and toast that Caroline had prepared.

"I've taken a long time to get over hurting Issy, Caroline. At first I thought my heartache was losing her, it was to some extent, but I felt her pain so much. The fact that I haven't heard from her tells me she's still not peaceful about leaving me."

"Well, I barely knew her but I couldn't help but be moved by her graciousness and warmth. The day she came to my office I was bowled over by how attractive she is. I can see how you would have felt right about trusting her."

"Who's been helping you with your pain Caroline?"

"Oh, don't worry about me. I just work you know that."

Kate stretched her hand across the kitchen table and stroked Caroline's arm, "But I have worried about you. I said some devastating things to you. I was very ashamed."

"Sush, Kate, not now. Let's leave all that until we both feel stronger."

They cleared up the kitchen and decided bed was more enticing than the cramped couch. Kate led Caroline upstairs; she found her a nightie that fit and after a hot shower, Caroline climbed into bed beside her. Kate had lit a couple of fragrant candles and put on one of their favourite music tracks; it was all so soothing.

They lay facing each other with their hands entwined.

"We can do this Caroline, we can make it work, can't we?"

"Yes, I believe we can; I have to believe; I 'm so much in love with you and I promise you I will do whatever it takes. I can't lose you, not again."

Kate pulled Caroline into her arms and soon they were both asleep; a contented sleep neither of them had experienced for a very long time.

Caroline stood in her kitchen. She felt a strength and resolve she didn't even know she possessed. This afternoon was it; the moment she would stand tall and tell all her detractors exactly who she was and what she wanted. She had literally summoned everyone, to the house. Alan and Celia were coming from the farm; after Celia's tantrum they had gone there, but there had been no packing of boxes or moving out.

John had ranted and raved about his number being blocked. She had simply told him he could rant all he liked; he could always leave a message on the house phone if he needed to talk to her.

Even William had been asked to come home for the weekend. Caroline needed at least one ally.

By three o'clock they were all in the lounge with a cuppa; except John, who had the inevitable whiskey in his hand.

"Thanks for being here all of you; I wanted to say some things and I want everyone to hear it so that we are all on the same page, my page.

First of all can I just say at the outset that I am not out to hurt anyone. I'm just not going to let me or Kate be hurt either."

"Oh no not a lecture about 'lesbinos' again" Lawrence said disdainfully.

"Shut up! How dare you speak to me like that. What happened to the caring son who fell into my arms and cried, telling me he didn't want anyone to be mean to me. You've been nothing but mean, to me and Kate."

Lawrence was shocked. He knew immediately that he had better be quiet; he was also embarrassed by the revelation about his tears; he looked at the carpet.

"Kate and I broke up some months ago. She left me because I was too cowardly to be out and proud with her. Oh yes, I wanted her here as my partner and lover but when it came to acknowledging that publically, I couldn't; too much personal and family baggage.

Since then, she has become pregnant , and met an amazing woman, and let me tell you, she is anyone's dream partner. However, Kate has made the choice that it's me she loves and wants to be with. This choice has cost her a lot; she has taken an enormous risk to trust me again. I will not let her down.

I love her more than I can tell you. I want, no I am, going to spend the rest of my life with her and we are going to have a baby together. I deserve to be happy; to be able to be myself. Our baby needs a peaceful and loving home, Lawrence and William need to be able to come home to happiness not tension and dysfunction."

"Mum, you do deserve that. We can all make sacrifices to help you." William stroked his mother's arm. How relieved she was that he was there, her one constant consolation.

"Now look Caroline," that familiar grating half drunken voice; "you can't just disrupt all our lives because you have some fancy idealistic dream; it's totally selfish."

"You, my dear ex-husband have nothing, I repeat nothing to say about disrupting lives. If you are half the intellect you claim, you would know that."

"Mum and Alan, I love you both and I want you close and part of our family, but Kate comes first, now and always. You have each other, you're happy and content. I can only ask you to want that for me, for us."

"Caroline, I only want what's best for you, you know that."

"Kate is what's best for me; end of story, so if you mean what you say, you will embrace her."

"So everyone, there is a potential buyer for the house who is willing to pay the asking price. Our solicitors will see to the arrangements. John If you are unhappy about any aspect of it you can go through them. While we are waiting for the sale to go through, I will be looking for a new home for us. I suggest you do the same. Your son's need to know they have a decent place in which to spend time with you."

"But Caroline, I'm with Judith and you know she's pregnant."

"That is not my concern John, your relationship, your baby, your job to get it all sorted. In case you've forgotten, I have a partner who is pregnant too and she is my first priority, along with our sons."

He sat for the longest time with his head in his hands. He wasn't used to this; Caroline was the one who sorted everything out. It wasn't his strength.

"Mum and Alan, I will help you as much as I can. If you want to still live close by we can try to find something suitable. However, it won't be under the same roof."

"That's alright love, we've been looking at places that are half way between here and the farm; less travelling for us." Alan, the wonderful peacemaker, "We can be on hand for both you and Gillian then." Celia looked first at Alan and then her daughter. Caroline was almost sure she spotted a chink in the armour.

"In the meantime, we can all start preparing for a move. I will need some time each week to be with Kate. Lawrence, you and William are welcome to have a say in where we move to and the house we buy. Kate will also have a say in it. I don't want her to move until after the baby is born unless she wants to; she and I can discuss that later."

There was no more conversation. Caroline felt totally drained. All she wanted to do was phone her Kate and hear her soothing voice. They had agreed that they could talk and see each other as they wanted now. But their relationship, their love, was still on a slow steady path to healing and trust.


	7. Chapter 7

**Choices Chapter Seven**

 _ **I'm going to have a couple of weeks holiday so I wanted to leave our gorgeous women in a good place. More Paris later. Enjoy.**_

Caroline and Kate were hand in hand waiting their turn for a scan; not sweaty and cold hands as before, just a firm grip. This time there was a sense of anticipation and excitement. Caroline had taken a couple of hours off to come with Kate, not just to give support, but this time to see her daughter, yes her daughter. She had begun to relish the prospect of a new family with her Kate.

"Kate McKenzie?" the same radiographer was calling her. They strolled into to the room and Kate lay down, once more grabbing Caroline's hand.

"You are lucky to have your good friend with you each time, Kate."

"Oh, I'm not a friend, Kate's my partner and this is our baby." Caroline could hardly believe these words had just left her mouth. She smiled at the ease she felt. 'It must be true if it comes so easily' she thought.

"Oh well it seems congratulations are in order then, By the look of the scan all is fine and your daughter is growing beautifully."

Caroline leaned over and kissed Kate. "You are doing so well my darling, everything is going to be alright."

Kate thought her chest would burst with pride and love for Caroline at that moment. No hesitation in acknowledging her and their child and it felt so good to be able to feel her support and know she was in such loving and safe hands once more.

Reluctantly they left each other in the car park, Caroline was going back to work and Kate was going home. Caroline had insisted she have the last teaching period off so she could rest.

As she opened her front door, Kate heard her Ipad ringing; it was someone on' facetime'. She opened it and was surprised to see Issy's face there.

"Hey, Katie darling, how are you?"

"I'm fine thanks. Oh my God, Issy it's so good to see you and hear your voice. How are you?"

"I'm well; sorry it's been so long. It's taken me quite a while to get myself together and the job is very demanding as you can imagine. Today is a rare day off and I thought I might just try you.

How come you aren't at school?"

"Oh I've just had my second scan and the boss gave me the last hour of the day off!"

"Is everything OK?"

Kate told Issy all about the scare she'd had and how Caroline had been with her. Issy wanted to know everything about the 'missing piece'. "Are you taking it slowly Katie?"

"Are you kidding, with you in my ear every time Caroline comes near me, I can't do any other."

They both laughed. It felt good to be able to banter and joke again. The way it used to be between them.

"I've got a new jigsaw Katie."

"What? Oh that's fantastic, come on spill!"

"It's very early days, four dates in fact, her name is Natasha, Tash, for short. She's a chemist in the pharmacy here at the hospital. She's smart and beautiful and funny like you Katie. I like her a lot."

Issy spent the next twenty minutes or so telling Kate all about her new girlfriend and her new job. Kate felt such relief; it was wonderful that at last there was a light at the end of everyone's tunnel.

"Please bring her up here for a weekend if ever you feel like a jaunt back to your old place. We'd love to see you and meet her."

"Got to go now, my lovely Katie; I'm still wearing your bracelet. It won't come off until my life is entwined with my one true love."

"Don't be so bloody dramatic, it doesn't suit you!" Kate laughed.

"Ok just winding you up; don't be a stranger. Love you."

"Love you too."

Kate sat back and felt the weight on her shoulders lifting. Her heart had continued to be heavy as she worried so much about Issy and whether she was getting through everything. Now she could start to let go a little more. She hoped so much that the day would come when they were close again, as friends.

That evening Caroline came over for dinner. Kate had prepared it all beforehand; she liked to sit a while with her before they ate, she gave Caroline a glass of wine and they both perched up on the kitchen stools.

"Guess who I spoke to today?"

'Who, your mum?"

"No, Issy; oh Caroline it was so good to hear from her. You know how worried I've been."

The conversation had played over and over in Kate's head that afternoon and so she was able to give Caroline a complete verbatim, word for word. Caroline surprised herself at how laid back and open she was to the two women continuing their friendship and care for each other.

Caroline reached down and delved into her handbag giving an envelope to Kate.

"What's this?"

"Lawrence asked me to give it to you. He showed it to me before, but I promise you I had nothing to do with it."

It was a card, the front of which had balloons and congratulations.

Dear Kate,

Congratulations on being pregnant. I am pleased for you. Sorry I have been mean to you. Even Angus thinks I'm a 'd...head'. Forgive me.

Yours

Lawrence

"Aw, Caroline that's so sweet. I wonder what brought this on."

"Presumably me; I gave him a bollocking the other day in front of the family. Something I should have done a while ago. He was so shocked I almost wanted to laugh. It's made him stop and think about some of the things he's said. Apparently he told Angus about it and he told Lawrence he was err, well you know, what he's written there."

They enjoyed their meal chatting about all the baby paraphernalia Kate was going to have to buy soon. Once they had finished and cleared up they curled up on the lounge together to spend the last couple of hours before Caroline had to leave.

"Kate, you know it's the long weekend coming up."

"Yep."

"I was wondering if you'd mind if we went away for the weekend. Lawrence has a rugby camp and so I'm free all weekend."

"It sounds pretty good to me. Where did you have in mind?"

"Actually, counting on you saying yes, I've booked something already but I'd like it to be a surprise. I'll pick you up at eight o'clock on Friday morning. Bring clothes for three days and a swanky outfit for the evening."

"Wow this sounds interesting, no hints?"

"Only that you'll need your passport."

Try as she may Kate wasn't able to get anymore information out of Caroline. She wanted to say; "no separate rooms' but thought better of it, even as a joke.

"Caroline, now that I've spoken to Issy, I feel different, almost ready to take the next step. She seems able to start moving on and I feel I can too.

We're both longing for each other; let's see what this weekend brings."

Caroline looked at her; "That would be wonderful, but it has to be when you are able to trust me again." Kate nodded and kissed her Caroline, "I really want to trust you, completely, with the rest of my life." They sat in each other's arms letting it all sink in.

"Oh I nearly forgot, I have another little envelope for you before I leave." Caroline dived into her bag.

She handed it to Kate who opened it and looked at a photocopy of a rather official looking document. It was the final contract on the sale of the house.

"Caroline, I don't know what to say. You've sold your house?"

"Yep, and now that the sale has gone through, you and I and our ever growing family are going to have to start looking hard for another place. No granny flat I might add, that's already been negotiated. John's very upset of course but bad luck. One thing he won't have is a set of keys. He wouldn't even have the address if I had my way but there's Lawrence to think of."

"John hasn't phoned you for ages, well, not while you've been with me."

Caroline handed her phone to Kate and told her to look him up. 'John' number blocked.

Kate took Caroline's face into her hands and kissed her. "All my doubts are fading, you are really something do you know that? I love you so much Caroline. This weekend will be ours, I promise. Thank you doesn't even come close for all of this."

"Ah but there's more, just you wait. Now much as I hate to, I have to go my darling. I need to see the whites of my son's eyes before he goes to bed."

As she climbed the stairs to bed, there was a lightness in Kate that she hadn't felt for a very long time.

Friday morning arrived and the two women set of for Leeds railway station. They were catching the nine o'clock train to London. They quickly found their seats in the first class compartment and settled into them. The train pulled out and Kate leaned over and kissed Caroline; "I am so excited. " She took her hand and then laid her head back against the headrest. She noticed out of the corner of her eye, the elderly couple across the aisle nudging each other and pointing to them holding hands, smiling at each other.

Kate couldn't help but go back in her mind to the last journey they had gone on together and how excited she had been then too. This time would be different, she knew that deep down.

Once the train pulled in to London; Caroline busied herself collecting their luggage and organising the tickets for the next leg of the journey. They needed to cross the concourse and head for St Pancras to catch the Eurostar to Paris, their final destination.

After completing all their passport formalities, they settled on to the train and their journey to Paris.

"Kate there's something else I want to show you."

"What?"

Caroline handed her passport and credit card to Kate.

Name on passport; Caroline Elizabeth Dawson

Name on Credit Card. C. E. Dawson

"Caroline, God, when did this happen?"

"Last week I finalised it all. I like the feel of it. It takes me back to a time when I wasn't Mrs Elliot and it's good. The boys are fine with it. I thought you might like it too."

"You did all this for me?"

"Ye

There was little else Kate could ask of this magnificent woman. She could hear Issy, 'This piece fits perfectly Katie'.

Three hours later they were at the reception desk of their hotel, a beautiful spot near Montmartre. Caroline had left all the talking to Kate the moment they arrived as she was fluent in French; it was quite sexy listening to her. There was only one room booked in the name of Elliot and McKenzie; a lovely one overlooking the garden;

Once all the bags were organised and clothes hung up, Kate disappeared into the bathroom. Caroline heard the shower running as she flipped through all the usual tourist brochures. She couldn't concentrate; her mind and body were focussed only on what she longed for. Ten minutes later, Kate emerged wrapped in one of the white matching bathrobes. She stood in front of Caroline and let it fall to the floor.

Caroline could hardly breathe, the beauty of the woman standing in front her was overwhelming. She could feel raw desire pulsing through her body.

"Kate, you are so beautiful, I want you so badly."

Kate began to undress Caroline slowly, kissing every inch of her body as she exposed it. Within seconds, they were lost in each other. The room disappeared around them; nothing else mattered; only the gentle and slow exploration of all that they had longed for these past few months. They found ecstasy in every touch, every kiss and their ultimate moment was like nothing either of them had ever felt before. They loved and loved until they felt completely one.

When they eventually reclaimed their surroundings, it was dark outside.

Caroline whispered ,"Dinner out or room service?"

"Let's go and feel the romance of Paris darling, walk the streets and soak up the atmosphere. We'll have a romantic dinner and then come back and start all over again."


	8. Chapter 8

**_I'm back refreshed and ready to tell more of our lovely ladies. Hope you enjoy today's twist. I loved writing it!_**

Chapter Eight

Kate waited patiently for Caroline to arrive at the hotel reception desk. She had gone ahead to ask about a good restaurant in the area; the desk clerk had understood perfectly when she asked for something small and discreet with private areas. He had made a booking for her straight away.

Caroline arrived a few minutes later and they set off. Kate slipped her hand into Caroline's as they walked along; some heads turned and looked, but they were on cloud nine and nothing but the feeling of their hands in each other's mattered at that moment. They had just spent the most sublime afternoon giving themselves to each other in a way that there could now be no turning back and no separation. Caroline felt stronger and freer than she could ever remember. It was true, she knew that now, bricks and mortar; ex-husband; cranky mother; and sons paled against the possibility of ever losing what she had just recaptured. She would do everything in her power to make her life with Kate and their children, as safe and happy as she could; whatever it took.

It was about a fifteen minute walk to the restaurant; strolling along the cobbled streets alongside all the evening crowds; the sights and sounds were truly exciting.

The waiter showed them to a secluded little booth towards the back and soon arrived with two flutes of champagne.

"I can only have a sip of this Caroline, just enough for a toast; then you'll have to drink the rest."

"I can do that, no problem, but surely one glass won't hurt."

"I'd rather not take any chances."

Caroline knew that Kate was ultra careful about everything to do with this baby; it was so precious and she wouldn't dare risk putting a foot wrong.

Kate lifted her glass and looked lovingly at Caroline, "to us my darling, to our future, which after this afternoon is safe and secure and everything we could want." Caroline reached across the table and held Kate's hand; "I love you more than I could ever have imagined possible. Thank you for giving me another chance and trusting me again."

Kate let go of Caroline's hand. "I have something for you; I wanted to mark this special weekend." She pulled a box out of her handbag and gave it to Caroline. Inside was a beautiful silver locket with the capital letter 'C' engraved on the front.

Caroline opened it and on one side there was a picture of Kate and on the other a tiny face which Kate had cut out of the latest scan picture.

The card with it, read :

For Caroline, keep us close to you always.

We love you with all our hearts. XX

Kate and ( to be decided ) Elizabeth Abike McKenzie

A waiter had been watching from the corner, he ran over to help Caroline fasten it round her neck, but Kate stopped him; she stood up and walked around the table, fastening the locket; then leaning in to kiss her; Caroline was overwhelmed and wished that the rest of the room would disappear and she could show Kate just what this meant to her. "Can I delay my thank you until we are alone?" Kate grinned and assured her she would be only too happy for that to happen.

As they enjoyed their meal, Kate approached the subject of the family. "Caroline, at some point we are going to have to slot back into everyone's life; we can't live apart from them. I really don't fancy only seeing you two or three times a week as we have been, I want you with me; when I wake up I want you there. However I don't want to move back into your place; it would feel like going backwards somehow. I just want us to have a new start."

"I have been thinking about it too Kate, what if we get my place packed up and everything into storage and Lawrence and I come and live with you until we find somewhere we all like and is suitable."

"How do you think Lawrence will feel about it?"

"Well given that he's apologised to you, I don't think he'll blot his copybook again anytime soon. His father is another issue of course. He will be pestering us to see Lawrence, but we'll just have to be strong about him coming round. Door step only!" Caroline chuckled as she said this; she could just see his face as they asked him to wait outside.

Soon the conversation moved to Kate's mother and father. She wanted Caroline to come to the nursing home to meet her father; she also broached the subject of a trip to New York before she was too pregnant.

"My mum knows how upset I've been Caroline. She tried many times to persuade me to ring you or see you and try and get things sorted out."'Don't be so stubborn my baby girl" she would say to me. I would like her to meet you before the baby comes. Travel will be too hard for a few months after. What do you think?"

This was a bolt from the blue for Caroline, but true to her new self, she didn't react too quickly but merely affirmed Kate that it would be good to try to plan it.

The meal finished, they strolled leisurely back to their hotel. The sense of urgency they had both felt that afternoon had diminished and they were able to love gently and slowly until they fell asleep curled around one another, safe in the knowledge that together they could face anything.

After eating breakfast in their room, they were deciding what to do for the rest of the day. Caroline had a treat planned for the evening. Kate loved her music and it just so happened that Palais Garnier, the Paris Opera house were performing Madame Butterfly, one of her favourites, that evening and Caroline had managed to get tickets. She was so excited that she could barely keep the secret.

They both jumped as Kate's phone pinged to say she had a message.

'Please call Dr James Fisher within the hour if possible'

Kate looked concerned.

"Who is it?" Caroline asked as she saw the concern on Kate's face.

Kate showed her the message. "He's your obstetrician isn't he?"

"Yes, O God Caroline what could this be about?"

Caroline moved straight into operational mode. "Well we won't know if we don't ring. Come and sit beside me and put it on speaker." They sat as close as they were able and Kate dialled the number.

"Dr Fisher?"

"Yes speaking."

"It's Kate McKenzie here, I just received your message, is there something wrong?"

"Ah, Kate, are you at home, could you come in and see me in the next hour?"

"No, I'm in Paris. What is it, can you tell me over the phone?"

"Well I suppose I can but you had better brace yourself. Is there someone with you?"

By now Kate was terrified. All she could think of was that there must have been something wrong in the tests they did; she was visibly shaking. Caroline put her arms around her and nodded for her to carry on. "Yes, Caroline my partner is here, please tell us."

"Well my dear the fact is, we're pretty sure you're having twins."

There was no sound from either woman. They just stared open mouthed at each other. After a few moments, Kate gathered herself; "But how, nothing has shown on the two scans I've had."

"I admit it is rare that it's taken this long, in your case twenty six weeks, to spot it, but it does happen. The radiographer had her suspicions but waited until I could review it properly. It seems that the second baby both times has been lying behind its sister and so the heartbeat has been muffled, but I was able to pick it up. It's possible that the second twin is a little smaller too, but again that's nothing to worry about.

There was a long pause. "I hope I've been the bearer of happy news albeit a little shocking. I do apologise but it can happen like this. The radiographer was right to wait for me to review it. Do you think you could come in and see me when you get back from Paris?"

"Yes, yes of course, I'll be back on Monday. I'll ring your clinic. Thank you for the call. Yes we are shocked but I'm sure we'll handle it. Thank you James."

"My pleasure Kate. I look forward to seeing you both on Monday."

Neither woman knew what to say for a few moments, they just sat looking at each other each lost in their own world of thought. Caroline eventually broke the silence. "Well I suppose I'd better give you the locket back, there's only room for two faces!" This broke the tension and they both burst out laughing.

"God Caroline, I hardly know what to think. It so wonderful in one way, it means our two babies will have each other to grow up with but having two at our age, we'll be permanently exhausted!"

"Oh well, you know, in for a penny and all that, I'm sure we can manage. I'd better stay on the good side of my mother though, I have a feeling we might need her. It is quite exciting and I'm sure once we get over the shock everything will be fine. You might have to finish work earlier though and we'd better get going on finding a house, we can't think of moving later with two small babies." Caroline could hardly stop her mouth from running, her mind was going flat out.

"Caroline slow down. We just need to let it sink in. Let's get ready and go out we don't want to miss all the things we've planned to do." Kate leaned into Caroline and kissed her, "I couldn't even think of this without you my darling, but I know there's nothing to be afraid of now."

They spent the day wandering around Paris, visiting all the places they had planned. Occasionally Kate would look at Caroline and say;"Pinch me." They would both laugh. Caroline made sure that they arrived back at the hotel in time for a rest before going out that evening. She felt even more protective now, carrying twins she guessed would be harder as the pregnancy progressed and she wanted to make sure Kate was kept healthy and calm.

The Opera was a massive hit. Kate was overwhelmed by the thoughtfulness in booking her favourite. Caroline noticed the tears in Kate's eyes as she became lost in the music and the story and she could hardly contain the love she felt for her; it was as if the Gods had at last smiled on them and were now showering them with gifts.

Monday morning came saw them both waiting outside the doctor's office. After calling them in, he explained about the unusual positioning of the second baby, rattling off all the usual statistics to reassure them. He then sent Kate along the corridor for a 3D scan which would show the babies in profile. Sure enough, there she was, another little girl snuggled up against her somewhat bigger sister almost as if she was protecting her. They both filled up with tears as the radiographer pointed all the important features to them. At the end she offered to make a copy of the scan for them. The doctor then confirmed what Caroline had anticipated, Kate would need to finish working by week 35; twins are often born a couple of weeks early and as Kate was a little older he wanted her well rested.

Later as they drove away Kate said, "It's real Caroline, we are having two babies, Oh God are you really ready for this, I know one was something you didn't really want, let alone two. Am I asking too much of you?"

"There's nothing you could ask of me that I wouldn't do if it is within my power. We'll be fine, we just need to look after you now. We'll start the house hunting as soon as we can. I'm sure the boys will kick in and help us.

"Now all we need to do is face the family, are you braced and ready my love?"


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

Caroline walked past her secretary into her office; Beverly followed her with the inevitable clip board on which were all the meetings and jobs Caroline would need to get to.

"You look very chirpy this morning. Did you have a good long weekend?"

"Yep, I sure did. Oh God, I know I can trust you and I can't hold it in anymore. I took Kate to Paris, we are back together Beverley and I couldn't be happier."

Beverley was jumping for joy inside at this news; she knew her boss well enough and had seen how miserable she had been these past few months. "I am so happy to hear that, you might be a bit less prickly now! Is Kate OK, is the pregnancy going well?"

"Me prickly," she feigned outrage; "Actually, Kate is more than well; we've just been to see the doctor and we're expecting twins."

"Oh my God Caroline, that's wonderful; you must both be so ecstatic."

"Well yes we are but we're still coming to terms with it. Two babies at our age is something we hadn't bargained on."

She took the list of jobs from Beverley and wondered how on earth she was going to concentrate on it all; her mind was in all kinds of turmoil about the news and all its implications.

Kate's brain was almost mush as she tried to hold down her classes and act as if all was normal. Some of the students had noticed her swelling tummy and offered her their congratulations on the quiet, but for most it was business as usual.

At recess she took her mobile phone and found a quiet corner, there was only one person she wanted to talk to, besides Caroline.

"Issy, is this a good time to talk to you for a minute?"

"Katie, my love how great to hear your voice; I have five minutes but I am off after six today so we can Skype if you like."

"Issy, I have some amazing news. I err we, Caroline and I that is, have just discovered that we're having twins."

"Oh gosh Katie, that must have been a shock, is it good or bad? I'm so happy for you."

"Good of course, but it will take some getting used to. I couldn't wait to tell you. Anyway how are you? Sorry it's been a while but it has been a time of sorting things out with Caroline, working out what we both want. How are you going with Tash?"

There was quite a long pause. "She's not you Katie darling; not quite the right piece. I guess I'm not ready yet, not as ready as I thought, but better to find out now."

Kate was dismayed to hear this; she had hoped for the best news which would be Issy happy and moving forward. "I'm sorry to hear that, are you coping OK?"

"Yes I'm fine, but you'll be cross with me when I tell you I've slipped back into my occasional one night stands, hell I've even had the odd 'comfort shag' with Jimmy. My workload is so heavy and consuming that I really don't have time to work on anything remotely serious, unless of course the right person just zaps me."

"I don't know what to say, I really have no right to say anything. We can talk about it this evening if you like."

"Yes, I'll call you when I'm home from the hospital and settled. Bye for now."

"Why are you making secret phone calls, skulking in a corridor Ms McKenzie?"

Kate nearly jumped out of her skin. "Caroline you scared the shit out of me! I'm not skulking anywhere; I just wanted some privacy for a few minutes."

"Who were you calling?"

"Issy, I just wanted to tell her my, err our, good news."

"Oh I see, is it going to be like this now, jumping on the phone to Issy every five minutes before we've even told the family."

Kate was enraged by this statement. She glared at Caroline. "I won't dignify that with an answer right now. Excuse me." She brushed past Caroline and made for the staff room.

Caroline stormed back into her office and slammed the door. After she had calmed down, she buzzed through to Beverley, "could you look and see if Kate is teaching next period?"

"No, she's off next."

"Would you mind ringing through to the staff room and asking her to come up here straight after lunch. Thanks"

Twenty minutes later after all the next classes were settled, Kate walked into Caroline's office. Before she could say anything, Caroline got out of her seat, walked around the desk and pinned her up against the closed door. She pressed her lips firmly against Kate's and kissed her roughly and hard. "That's how jealous I am; pathetic isn't it?"

"Caroline, there's nothing to be jealous about. Issy is someone I care for deeply like a kid sister who's a bit more than that; if it makes sense. I wanted to tell someone, someone of mine, you've already told Beverley."

"How do you know that?"

"She sidled up to me before lunch and whispered her congratulations, and I don't mind. Surely you can't resent me having close friends, remember my mum is in America, I have no siblings, no other family here except my dad who doesn't know me."

"Oh God, see how selfish and unthinking I can still be. I'm so sorry."

"It's just about trust Caroline, respect for each other, and if we become too possessive we will suffocate each other.

Issy is still struggling; her new relationship has not worked out; I guess she's not over us yet. I'm going to speak to her tonight; I want to be there for her. She's so happy for us, for the babies. I promise you she's no threat my darling."

Caroline was once again in awe of what Kate could bring out in her.

Here it was, the night of nights. They had invited Celia, Alan and Lawrence to dinner at Kate's. It was just going to be a simple take-away as it was a school night, but they couldn't put off the inevitable anymore. Kate found herself quite nervous, wishing Caroline would hurry up and get there. Celia and Alan were coming from the farm and she dreaded the thought of them arriving first. Lawrence and Caroline were going to stay the night, and Kate had gone to a lot of trouble to de-feminise the spare room; she had even had a quiet conversation with Angus about what comics she could put on the bedside table; at least she knew the lad was a comic fanatic. Angus had given her the names of the ones Lawrence was hanging out for and she had got them. There were one or two 'masculine' items in her bathroom too.

She heard the familiar sound of Caroline's car door outside, then the sound of a second. She realised Alan and Celia had arrived at the same time. It would be interesting to see how Caroline treated her when the family was with them, she couldn't help but remember the secrecy and distance that was normal when they lived together before.

Celia's first surprise was to see Caroline pull out a set of keys and let them in to the house. "Kate darling we're all here." No mistake. Things were different and Kate could feel the tension dissipating; Celia on the other hand could feel it building. Caroline walked into the room and pulled Kate into her, kissing her tenderly. "I hope you've not tired yourself too much getting ready for us."

"Caroline, I'm pregnant not dying, stop fussing." Kate walked over to Celia and Alan and welcomed them. Alan was a darling and congratulated her on the baby. Celia nodded in agreement but refrained from getting too enthusiastic. Lawrence looked a little sheepish and put out his hand. Kate put her arm loosely around his shoulder and whispered;"there's something on your beside table in the spare room if you get bored."

Lawrence feigned the need to put his bag in his room and galloped upstairs to see what was there. He was surprised when he saw the comics and immediately lay on the bed and started to devour them. Nice one Ms McKenzie.

Once everyone was settled and had a drink of some kind, Caroline called Lawrence downstairs. "We need a few minutes of your time kiddo if you can drag yourself away from 'Captain whatever his name is" she called upstairs.

"I have something to tell you all," Kate started. "Caroline and I found out yesterday that we are having twins!"

Silence, shock, everyone looking at everyone; Kate slipped her hand into Caroline's for moral support. "We are of course over the moon to be having two healthy babies but we aren't silly enough not to know it's going to be hard work with two little ones at our age."

Lawrence was the first to speak. "So I'm having two brothers or sisters?" The women had decided that there was no real need to hide the babies' gender as they would be buying stuff soon and people would know. "Yes you'll be having two little sisters."Caroline said very gently.

"Cool" was all he said. Then back to the comic. Caroline got up and kissed the top of his head; "Thank you sweetheart."

Celia was next to speak;"Well, I can see now why you'd want to be with Caroline, you wouldn't bring up two of them easily on your own."

Kate was ready. "No you're right Celia there is no one I would want to be with other than Caroline to bring up our children."

"What about their father, what does he think?"

"I think he'll be thrilled when we tell him Celia. He's a good man, one of my oldest and best friends. But, he knows that these babies are ours, mine and Caroline's and he won't stand in our way. We'll decide later what if any, involvement he has."

Alan walked over to Kate and kissed her."Congratulations love," then he did and said the same to Caroline. "We'll be around and we'll help in any way we can won't we Celia. Everyone looked at Celia. There was a slight chink in the armour. Caroline had seen it many times before and knew it usually meant surrender to the inevitable. "Yes love, we'll do our best. We've got Calamity as well you know."

"I know mum and we will be grateful for anything you do for us. Kate's mum is going to take some time off from University when they are born so she can help out too."

"So the next major step is to look for a house. We want Lawrence and William to have a say but we will be a family of six in a few months. God it sounds amazing doesn't it?" Caroline said as she nuzzled her face against Kate's. "In the meantime, Lawrence and I will move here to Kate's until we find something suitable. What about you two?"

"Oh we're just going to stay at the farm until we find something. We have been looking and there are a few nice bungalows available. I'm waiting for my tenants to tell me if they want to buy my little house or not." Alan explained.

So far so good; a bit cool Caroline thought but no fireworks thank God. "I'm just going to ring the restaurant and ask them to deliver our order in the next half hour. Caroline disappeared into the kitchen with her phone. Lawrence bolted back upstairs and Alan headed for the bathroom.

"I know, I wasn't very nice to you before Kate. I just didn't want to see Caroline make a fool of herself; I only ever want her to be happy."

"Celia, I understand that. I don't bear any grudges. But when Caroline and I separated we were both utterly miserable. I even tried to forget her by finding a new partner. It didn't work for either of us. We are just very much in love and want to be a family. I want my, our children to grow up in a peaceful loving environment. Caroline and I can give them that and the boys will be wonderful with their little sisters. Lawrence is still young and boyish but he'll come around, he's a good kid. We both really value family and we want you and Alan to be part of it."

Caroline stopped dead in her tracks as she came through the doorway. A scene she never in a million years expected, was before her; Celia hugging Kate, and telling her that she would do her very best to be a good mother and grandmother. It brought tears to her eyes. "Can anyone join in this hug?" she said as she wrapped her arms around them both.

Not long after, the meal arrived and they all got stuck in. There was a lot of chatter about things that needed to be bought for the babies and houses that needed to be inspected; all in all it had turned into quite a good night. That is until there was a knock at the door.

"Who can that be?" Caroline asked Kate quizzically. Kate got up and went to the door. "Oh God" Caroline heard her say. "Who is it?" Kate walked back in to the room. "This is one for you Caroline, it's John."

"What does that nit wit want?" she heard Celia say as she took a deep breath and walked to the door.

She put on the outside light and the opened the door.

"John, what are you doing here?" He had obviously been drinking as usual.

"I came to see my family, my family who think they can cut me off and hide from me."

"John you're drunk, you need to get a cab and go home to Judith." He tried to push past her into the house but she blocked his way.

"Aren't you even going to let me in, my son is in there."

"No, I am not going to let you in. My family and I are in the middle of dinner. This is not Conway Drive; it's Kate's and my home. You are drunk and I don't want your son to keep seeing you like this. For God's sake John where's your dignity?"

"Bollocks to you, you're the one with no dignity, shacking up with another woman who's having a baby that's not even yours."

"That's it. If you don't leave right now, I will call the police. So you choose, a taxi or a paddy wagon?"

"Popsicle!" Lawrence shouted as he came to the door. He stopped short as he saw the state of his father. "Mum he's drunk again."

"I know Lawrence, please go inside and I'll deal with this." She said nothing else, just stared at him until eventually he walked off. She had no idea if he got back into his car or called a taxi. She didn't care.

Caroline offered to drive Alan and Celia back to their flat in Conway Drive as they weren't too good in the dark, but they assured her it wasn't far and they would take it slowly. Lawrence thanked Kate again for the comics and said he was going to go back upstairs. That left the two of them alone for the first time that day. After cleaning up they decided to call it a night and go to bed. They were both ready to just fall into each other's arms and digest the day's events. Caroline was also aware that they had managed their first argument and she was keen to soothe away any hurt she might have caused Kate.

"Can you forgive me for yesterday's outburst Kate, I feel so bad about flying off the handle?"

"It's over darling, of course we are going to have fights but it's about how we resolve them." With that, Kate slipped under the sheets and began to stroke and kiss Caroline's body, she knew every sensual spot, every move that would make Caroline groan with desire for her. "It will be so wonderful when we can do this every night, in our own home." Kate whispered with a husky voice.

"Every night until two little lungs start screaming and we won't be able to say 'your turn' because we'll both be up. So Kate McKenzie let's make the most of it." Caroline rolled Kate on to her side so that she could hold her closer, the baby bump was starting to get in the way. She let her hands wind around her lover, caressing her and bringing her to a place of ecstasy. They both giggled as they tried to stifle their cries of pleasure, they were aware that Lawrence was on the other side of their bedroom wall.

As they lay basking in the depth of their love and enjoyment of each other Kate asked, "Caroline, when we look for our new home can we find one where our bedroom that is at the other end of the house from the others?" they both laughed, promising to make that happen.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

 _Yes I admit it - I'm a hopeless romantic. Enjoy. Thanks for all your lovely comments. I'm enjoying writing this so much._

Life was really buzzing this morning. Caroline and Kate had found a lovely new barn conversion near Bramwell village; half way between Halifax and Harrogate. As luck would have it, there was a small terraced cottage that Celia and Alan had fallen in love with and it would only be a ten minute walk between the two homes. Gillian would be a fifteen minute drive away. It all fitted together really well. Lawrence wasn't overly keen as it was out of town, but they had promised him as soon as he turned 17 and passed his driving test, they would let him use Kate's small car.

Caroline had tried to persuade Kate to keep her cottage and rent it out but Kate was adamant that as Caroline had sold her home, she would sell hers; it was an act of trust and all part of her desire for a completely new start. Besides it would all help with their somewhat large mortgage.

Alan and Celia had moved a couple of week previous as the new owner had moved into Conway Drive. Today it was Caroline and Kate. Gillian and her crew were on hand at the new house and the two women plus Lawrence, William and Roxy were at Kate's finishing the final packing and the cleaning. No-one was allowing Kate to do anything heavy and so she busied herself putting food and fragile things to go in the car. Her heart was on fire with the excitement and the joy of it all, she was at last totally happy. Her magnificent Caroline; about to be someone's mum; and two step sons that she was growing to love more with each passing day; she couldn't ask for more; or could she? She was waiting for the right moment to ask Caroline to marry her; but not just yet; she knew the moment she wanted and would wait patiently.

The removal van eventually pulled away and the young ones left in Kate's car to follow it. They made one last inspection of everything and then Caroline picked up the car keys.

"Wait, darling, come here." Kate pulled her into her arms.

"I have loved living in this cottage. It's been a place of healing and love; I came here after Richard and then I met you and it became our sanctuary, the place we could fall in love safely. Issy came and went and left me healed and ready to fall in love with you all over again." She kissed Caroline deeply and with every ounce of passion and tenderness she had. "Tonight we start a new chapter, our new home, new family and a love affair that will never diminish and never end."

Through her tears Caroline could manage only the word, "Never".

Everyone was busy arranging furniture and unpacking boxes. Caroline was very grateful that Gillian and her lot were there to help as within a couple of hours the place was very nearly finished. A pizza van pulled up and delivered a late lunch which everyone tucked into.

Gillian clapped and quietened everyone. "Right you two, who's carrying who over the threshold?" Both Caroline and Kate burst out laughing, Kate with a hint of a blush; she was still not used to all the public involvement in their life.

"Well, I'm at a distinct disadvantage as, if I have to carry Kate, I'm actually carrying three!"

"It's OK mum, Lawrence and I have it in hand." The two boys made a chair with their arms and carried Kate in first and then their mother. Once inside, they all clapped and cheered and Raff popped the cork on a bottle of champagne. It was a magic moment.

The house was perfect for them. It had a lovely kitchen which Kate was grateful for as Caroline and her kitchen were joined at the hip. The living area was a huge open space, ideal for little ones who would be running around. At one end of the house there were three large bedrooms and bathroom and at the other end a mezzanine floor with the master bedroom, en-suite and a parent's retreat which would serve as the nursery. On one of their visits alone, Caroline had got Kate to go into their bedroom and pretend to cry in pleasure and she had listened from the nearest downstairs bedroom, laughing hysterically; not a sound with the door closed. They were safe!

As darkness fell, just their own immediate family were left. Caroline had made a casserole the previous day and they had enjoyed their meal and cleaned up. The boys had set up the television and were lounging with Roxy watching a movie. The two women climbed upstairs and settled down on their own lounge which they had set up in the retreat.

"God just think darling in a few weeks we'll be sitting on here nursing two babies." Caroline sighed as she put her arm around Kate.

"We sure will. But tonight is for us, not babies. C'mon let's go and have a shower and go to bed. If I'm to ravish you it will have to be soon as I am wilting fast." Kate got up and pulled Caroline into the bathroom. "Wait a second." Caroline left the room and walked out on to the staircase. "Kids, we're off to bed; hope you all sleep well." "OK Ma, sleep well yourselves." William looked up at his mother and winked.

When she returned to the bathroom Kate was naked and starting to run the water. Caroline was again enthralled by her natural beauty; she often wondered if pregnancy had made her as luscious and desirable as it had her glorious Kate. She undressed and stepped into the shower. The water felt good and she could sense herself relaxing. Kate was gently washing her, kissing each area as she moved across her body. "I love you so much Caroline, thank you for all of this." Caroline groaned as her lover's hands excited her. She returned the pleasure, washing Kate and leaning into her pregnant belly kissing it and telling her babies how excited she was waiting for them. Soon they lay together ready to christen their new bed. They had decided that Caroline's old bed needed to go. It was the last vestige of John in their home , except for the one wonderful thing he gave her, their sons.

Soon they were lost in each other. It was all about giving; letting go; feeling safe; feeling forever. Caroline hoped to God their experiment with noise had worked as Kate called her name over and over. They lay back waiting for their bodies to come down from the amazing heights they had brought each other to. Caroline reached across the space and entwined her fingers with Kate's; they fell asleep quickly, a deep and contented sleep.

Christmas came around before they knew it. Kate had resigned from school as she was now into count down. The staff had been marvellous in their support for both of them and made them promise to bring the babies in as soon as they could.

They had offered to have Christmas at their place and all the Greenwoods were coming.

They both went to see Kate's dad, the day before Christmas Eve. They had asked if it would be possible to bring him home for Christmas Day but the nursing home had advised against it, he would be too confused in a new environment. They picked up some of his favourite sweets and bought him a new pullover.

They sat in front of him. The nurse had put his new sweater on and he was hoeing into his sweets. They never tried to explain who Caroline was and he had never asked.

He looked up at his daughter, "Katherine, why are so late home from school? I've been worried."

"It's OK Dad, I'm here now. Do you know you are going to be a grandfather?"

"Am I?" "Yes Dad, two of them. We are having twins." She took her father's hand and placed it on her stomach. "Can you feel them?"

"Oh yes; will they be coming to live with us?"

Kate's eyes filled with tears. She had been such a daddy's girl and it was hard to lose him this way. "We'll see. We might not all fit."

Caroline put her arm around Kate's shoulder as a gesture of comfort. She had lost her own father to dementia but she had never been that close to him and the loss was more of a relief in the end.

They both kissed Douglas and wished him a happy Christmas, Kate promising to come back soon.

Christmas Day was busy and noisy and wonderful. Everyone was relaxed and they all pitched in to help with the lunch and clearing up. Calamity entertained them all laughing and running around when William came in dressed as Father Christmas.

Caroline leaned into Kate, "You know we've now got another seven or eight years of this to come, Santa and all the trappings!" Kate nodded, "You're in your element, don't deny it."

As Caroline watched her boys she did feel just a twinge of sadness that their father was such a loose canon that they were unable to even conceive of asking him to join them for Christmas. She couldn't risk him upsetting Kate. However the boys were going to spend part of Boxing Day with him. William had recommended that Roxy stay with Caroline and Kate as he too couldn't trust the situation.

When half the family were dozing and the other half engrossed in electronics, Kate and Caroline pulled Gillian to one side.

"We've got a proposition for you. Would you be interested in helping Kate, like as a paid nanny when the babies are born? Now that we live closer we thought you might like to take it on instead of some of your supermarket shifts. Of course we would pay you the going rate." Caroline explained.

"Oh wow, well I'd have to think about it. It sounds good. You wouldn't want me to live in would you?"

Kate responded quick smart; "Oh no of course not. We can manage the evenings and nights but it would be good to have you here for a few hours some days. It would be an extra bonus for them to have their aunty involved."

Gillian became uncharacteristically coy; she smiled; "God I never thought about it like that, yes I will be their aunty won't I? Blimey, I've gone from no nieces or nephews to four in the space of two years! I'll give it a bit of thought and get back to you."

Caroline offered some encouragement, "Mum and Alan are only 10 mins walk away and they said they would be willing help out when they could."

Later in the evening there were two Skype calls, one from Ginika, Kate's mum, and one from Issy. Kate insisted that Caroline sit in on them. Both of them were interested in the house and how the pregnancy was going. Ginika told them that she had put the University on notice that she would be leaving the moment she got the call that Kate was in labour.

Issy seemed relaxed and happy to talk to Caroline as well as her lovely Katie. Her life was very busy but she said she was finding time to prioritise what she wanted. She asked if she could come and see them when the babies arrived and they both welcomed her warmly.

"Thank you Caroline that would have meant a lot to Issy."

"About time I grew up. It will be great to see her."

A week later, Gillian rang and said she's love to do it and could manage three days a week. This was perfect for them. Kate felt she could manage the other two with a bit of help from the oldies.

Caroline threw her pen on to her desk and held her head in her hands; she was finding it harder and harder to concentrate at work. Kate had reached thirty six weeks and James Fisher had put them on notice to be prepared any time. She was constantly on edge, checking her phone every ten minutes, phoning home to check on Kate.

The nursery was now almost ready, they had spent many weekends shopping for two of everything. Kate was getting more exhausted as the weeks went by, she was very big now and just getting around the house was uncomfortable.

Gillian was on notice that she may be needed soon and she was getting very excited about the prospect of helping. She loved babies and had been fantastic with Calamity. It gave Caroline a lot of solace to know that when she went back to work, Gillian would be there with Kate.

That evening as they were cleaning up after dinner, Lawrence came out of his bedroom with is phone.

"Ma, popsicle's on the phone and he's asking if he can talk to you."

"Ask him what he wants, I want to help Kate get to bed, I haven't really got time for this."

Lawrence went back to his phone and reported what his mother had just said.

"He says he really wants to speak to you and he won't tell me what's wrong."

Caroline took the phone, motioning for Kate to go ahead and she would be upstairs in a moment.

"John, what's the matter, this isn't a good time."

"Caroline I didn't know who else to talk to. I've been at the hospital all day. Judith lost the baby. It died in the womb and she had to deliver it. It was awful. So upsetting."

There was a long pause. "John I'm so sorry to hear that. Are you both alright?"

"I just feel so sad. Judith's sister came up from the south and has taken her back home with her."

Again there was an awkward pause. "I was wondering if I could come round Caroline."

"John, as much as I would like to offer you some support, I'm afraid it's not possible right now. Kate is very heavily pregnant and I can't subject her to this kind of conversation. She's already very worked up about the delivery. I have to put her first John. She could go into labour any minute."

"What will I do Caroline?" his voice was genuinely full of heartache.

"Why don't you ring Gillian? She might have time to talk to you."

"She told me a while ago to stop calling her and keep away from the farm. I don't think she'd let me."

"Then I don't know John. You have friends from University could you ring them?"

"I don't know, I'll try I suppose." He waited. The response he was waiting for did not come. Caroline was not going to give in. He had really blown it. No-one seemed to want him. Why was everyone so selfish, so very selfish, couldn't they see he needed their help.

"I've to go now John. I do hope you find someone to sit with you. Is there a counsellor at the hospital you could talk to?"

"Don't worry about me, I'm going." With that he hung up.

She called Lawrence, gave him his phone and told him what had happened. She asked him not to mention it until she had time to speak to Kate which would not be until at least the morning.

She walked into their bedroom and found Kate sound asleep which was such a relief. She didn't want to have to lie to her about the conversation and she knew that if she told her it would upset her no end.

She climbed in to bed herself, she felt sad for Judith but she knew it was most likely down to her drinking. She wondered how any woman could put her child at risk that way; but then she wasn't an alcoholic and so she really didn't understand how hard it was. She wrapped herself around Kate and tried to stop the conversation in her head. She needed sleep. It would be a rare commodity soon.

At 4.12am precisely, Kate shouted from the bathroom. "Caroline come quickly, I think my waters have broken." She rushed into the bathroom and there was no mistake, she had seen this twice herself. She sat Kate on a chair and picked up her phone. She made two quick calls, the first for the ambulance and the second to America.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

 ** _They're here. They're so beautiful!_**

"Lawrence, Lawrence, wake up." Caroline gently shook her son. He stirred looking confused, "What's wrong Ma?"

"Kate's gone into labour and we are just waiting for the ambulance. When you get up, walk round to granny's and have breakfast, then ring me. I'll leave it to you to decide if you want to go to school. Please ring William from granny's."

"Ok Ma, will Kate be alright?"

"Yes, don't worry, first time mums can sometimes take hours to give birth. I promise I'll keep in touch." She kissed her son's head; he couldn't know how his life would change in the next few days, two tiny people in the house and all the demands they would make on everyone. However she felt that their home life was settling into something easy and happy for him so far.

Kate had managed to clean herself up a little and put on some loose clothes. Caroline was running around madly getting the suitcase they had packed and making sure they had everything they needed. She thought of all the people who needed to know but it was far too early for her to start ringing.

Ten minutes later, the ambulance arrived. They got Kate on board and asked Caroline if she would be travelling with them. "Yes she will," Kate shouted loudly," I'm not going anywhere without her."

So, Caroline gave away any thought of following in the car. She climbed in and sat beside Kate. "It's OK darling, you're going to be just fine." Kate started to pant hard as the first contractions started. "Oh God!" She squeezed Caroline's hand so hard that it felt it was being crushed.

Twenty minutes later they arrived at the maternity unit. The paramedics took Kate straight through to the delivery suite while Caroline went to the desk to sort out the admission paperwork.

A rather officious looking woman, who obviously hated being on night duty, threw some forms at Caroline and told her to fill them in. Caroline duly obeyed and handed them back.

"Next of kin; who is Caroline Dawson?"

"I am."

"Well what relationship are you?"

"Kate's my partner."

"Is it official? Like, have you registered as a partnership, because if you haven't, it has to be a family member." The woman said in her monotonous uncaring voice.

Caroline went into full battle mode, she was desperate to get to Kate. "Now listen to me, my partner is about to deliver our children. She will be desperate for me to get in there. Now finalise the bloody paperwork or I won't be responsible for what happens!"

The woman glared at her and nodded for her to go in. 'Idiot' Caroline muttered to herself as she strode along the corridor.

Inside the delivery room were the midwife, another nurse and Kate lying on her side on the bed.

"Caroline, come here please." Caroline took her jacket off and went to sit beside her. She stroked Kate's head and kissed her. "It's ok I'm here, we're all here ready, all you have to do is go with it now and do what Carol tells you."

Carol, Kate's midwife smiled at Caroline, "I've phoned Dr Fisher, he should be here soon to check on her. But she's got quite a way to go yet as you can imagine."

Caroline smiled back and nodded knowingly. The next moment there was another guttural groan from Kate as a new wave of contractions took hold of her. It was just a waiting game now.

At 7.30, Caroline slipped into the corridor to ring her mother.

"Mum, has Lawrence turned up yet?"

"No why would Lawrence be here at 7.30 in the morning? I'm just making Alan a cup of tea."

"Kate's gone in to labour, we came to the hospital at 4.30 this morning and I told Lawrence to come to your place when he woke up."

"Shall I ring him love? He'll be late for school otherwise."

"No it's OK mum, let him sleep as long as he wants and tell him I said not to bother going to school. He can come to the hospital when the babies are born. Could you ring Gillian and William for me?"

"Course I can, is Kate alright?"

"So far, so good. Her obstetrician is here on hand and will keep a close eye on her. Ginika is on her way, she just text me to say she's on a flight in the next hour. Could you or Gillian pick her up from Manchester airport? I'll text you the details."

"Of course love, me and Alan will sort everything out. You go back to Kate now and give her our love."

Caroline returned to Kate's side. "Where the hell have you been, how could you leave me, I'm dying here!" Kate shouted. Caroline and the midwife looked at each other and chuckled.

"Kate, you're not dying, this is what labour is like sweetheart, it's painful, but when it's over and our beautiful babies are here, it will all be forgotten."

"Yeah right" was all she got in return.

At 4.30 Ginika arrived with Gillian. She knocked on the door and motioned for Caroline to come outside. "Kate, your mum's here, do you want her in here for the delivery?" Kate nodded.

Caroline was able to hug Kate's mum for the very first time. They had got to know one another over Skype but this was a special moment for them. "How is she Caroline? Twins, my God."

"She's doing OK, she starting to get very tired but being brave. She'd like you in with us for the delivery."

"Are you ok with that Caroline? It's a very intimate moment you know."

"Yes of course, I'm fine. It will be a precious memory for both of you."

Kate reached out for her mother the moment she walked into the room. They held each other for quite a while until the next contraction came.

"Kate, my darling, I'd given up hope, to my shame, of ever having grandchildren. You must know how excited and happy I am."

Kate just smiled and squeezed her mother's hand.

The light had started to fade, it was now 12 hours since labour started; Kate was becoming very exhausted.

"Caroline, I'm starting to think about a caesarean here, the babies are still OK but Kate is getting very tired." Carol said. "James wants an update in twenty minutes and then we'll look at booking a theatre."

Caroline felt a great sadness coming over her. Kate was desperate to give birth naturally, even though James had warned her it may not be possible.

Two minutes later there was a huge scream from Kate, Carol quickly separated her legs and felt her cervix."Oh boy, someone's on their way. She's fully dilated and there's a little head here."

Caroline's heart started racing. This was it. She was breathless with excitement and fear.

"Kate, one of them is here, push now." Kate gave an almighty yell; all the veins in her face were protruding; James rushed in having been summoned by Carol.

"Ok Kate, this is it for number one; another big push." The next moment there was a gurgling cry as a beautiful little person was held up and put onto Kate's chest for a few seconds.

"Come on Caroline, cut the cord so we can focus on getting her sister out."

Through a haze of tears, Caroline cut her baby's cord and then went back to Kate's side. "She's beautiful darling."

"There's a problem here," James whispered to Carol. "The cord is round this little one's neck. Get me some forceps and scissors."

" Caroline heard this and a felt like a cold wind had suddenly blown over her. "Do something, please!" she shouted.

James and Carol worked together for a few moments and eventually freed the cord. The baby was delivered, but no cry. Carol whisked her off to the treatment table and worked on her with suction and oxygen. It was as if time stood still. Then it came; a resounding cry.

"Oh God, thank you, she's alright. They're both alright. You've done it. You're fantastic. I love you."

The newest arrival was placed on Kate's chest for a few moments and then they were both put in cribs as they needed a little oxygen. One baby weighed in at 6lbs and the other smaller one at 5.5lbs.

Caroline and Ginika held each other and cried tears of joy and relief; then hugged and kissed an exhausted Kate.

"You two might like to go outside now and have a few moments while we sort Kate out and get her back to her room." Carol suggested. "Before you go though; because they are twins, it helps us a lot if we can have a name for them as we would usually just write 'baby McKenzie'."

"We have chosen them Kate said quietly. Could you being the cribs over here for a moment please?"

Carol wheeled them to the bedside. Both women looked at them. Kate said," The first one born is Flora Elizabeth and the other Grace Abike; but their surname is McKenzie-Dawson."

Caroline looked at Kate; this was something they had never discussed. She had hoped with all her heart that it would be so, but felt it was something Kate needed to decide. She leaned over and held her, "Thank you my darling."

When they got out into the corridor they were confronted by, what seemed like an army of people. Celia and Alan were there, Lawrence, William and Roxy, who had just arrived, and Gillian. Caroline reported all the details of the babies and introduced Ginika to them all. There was a lot of kissing, hugging and congratulations. It was decided that everyone would go back to Caroline and Kate's place so they could settle in and have something to eat. Later, Ginika and the boys would come back to the hospital to meet the babies. Caroline would be staying overnight at the hospital. The rooms had double beds in them for that purpose, something that had not been available even when her boys were born. She asked William and Roxy to bring both cars over; they could keep the small one. Fortunately she had installed the baby capsules in her car the previous weekend so that they would be ready.

Gillian, Alan and Celia were allowed in to the nursery to look at them through the window. "Aw look at them, they're so tiny." Gillian cooed at the window. Celia felt a surge of joy she never expected to feel. She kept telling herself that these babies were going to be Caroline's as well but was struggling to come to grips with it. Looking at them now she knew it wouldn't be a problem. They had the most delicate olive coloured skin and loose black curls, they were adorable.

Caroline kicked off her shoes and climbed on to the bed beside Kate; snuggling in to her. "You did it, you're a mum; we're mums!" Kate looked back at Caroline with tired but deeply satisfied eyes.

"Yes we did it. We have two healthy beautiful babies. I couldn't think of you not being with me for them, for us.

Caroline, you know the surname we gave them?"

"Yes, that was a wonderful surprise for me."

"I would like to make that official. I would like it to be my surname too."

Caroline was silent for a few moments."Are you saying what I think you're saying?"

"Yes, I want us to be married."

Caroline kissed her tenderly ; then stroking her face; "I can't imagine not being married to you."

This was the moment Kate had been waiting for and it was perfect.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

 _I've been in two minds whether to take this any further. However there is a little bit more of the story I would like to tell. Thanks to you for your lovely reviews._

Caroline woke to the sound of a screaming baby. She rolled over and looked at the time; 3.40. She felt for Kate across the bed but the space was cold and empty. She struggled out of bed and shuffled her way over to the nursery. Kate was breastfeeding Grace and Flora was lying beside her on the lounge whilst her exhausted mother tried to rub her tummy and pacify her. She stopped for a moment to take in the picture; if she had any spiritual inclination, seeing her beloved and beautiful wife feeding her child, was deeply moving, almost transcendent.

"Kate, why didn't you get me up?"

"Caroline, you have to go back to work today, you need your rest. We'll be OK."

Caroline whisked Flora up and over her shoulder soothing her as she walked around the room. The thought of leaving this little family and going back to work was something she had been dreading in one way, but looking forward to in another. She had gone into full organisational mode when they came home from hospital. There were lists and formulas for just about everything. Flora was dressed in either yellow or white and Grace in pink or blue; as they were identical, it was difficult to decide who was who in a hurry. Kate would alternate breast and bottle for each baby and Caroline had reckoned 'colour coding' was the answer. Kate was resistant at first and reminded her wife that this was a nursery not a school sports team! However she had to admit after a while that it did make things easier.

But, amidst all the lovely mushiness of the situation, Caroline had days when she thought her brain was on a downhill slide and she longed for some stimulation. Three weeks parental leave was finishing this weekend and she would be back to school full swing on Monday morning.

Ginika had been a great help for the two weeks she was there. Caroline appreciated the chance to get to know her and she was reminded daily where Kate got her calmness and kindness from. The woman had a fine mind and Caroline had enjoyed the times they had managed an hour or two of chat about all things academic.

Ginika opened up a lot of history about their family that Kate had only ever alluded to. She was able to paint a clearer picture. She also took the opportunity to share how unhappy Kate had been at times when things weren't good between her and Caroline, who as she listened felt a familiar regret and guilt creep up inside her again. There were no excuses, she told her mother in law, and a promise that she would cherish and protect Kate in the future.

Gillian had been doing a few hours a week to familiarise herself with their routine, but from Monday she would be there three full days which was a consolation for the headmistress.

Monday morning arrived and the inevitable goodbyes. Gillian and Kate stood at the door, each with a baby in their arms, to wave off Lawrence and his mum.

Around three o'clock in the afternoon there was a knock at the door. Kate had gone for a nap, and so Gillian answered it.

"Gillian, Hi, how are you?"

"John what the hell are you doing here?"

"I came to pick Lawrence up to take him out for tea and I'm just a bit early. Can I come in?" he asked as he pushed past her.

"You're in aren't you; I don't think either Caroline or Kate would like this."

"Yes, well they aren't here by the look of it."

"Kate's just having a quick nap but she'll be up in half an hour as I'm due to go home then."

John walked over to the two capsules and looked at the twins. "My, two of them eh; cute aren't they? but I don't think Caroline would have signed up for this. I always wanted a little girl you know but she wouldn't have any more children and now she's lumbered with these two. What a crazy mess she's got herself into. I bet she really regrets it."

What John couldn't have known was that Kate had woken up when the door bell went and had heard every word John said. It cut her to the core and filled her with her old insecurities about Caroline not wanting a baby. She decided not to go downstairs, just to listen. Caroline had phoned her to say she was leaving on the final bell and would be home in about twenty five minutes. Kate wanted to leave the prey in the trap for her to finish off.

Caroline drove up to the house and immediately noticed the green BMW in the drive. 'Shit, what the hell is he doing here' she muttered to herself as Lawrence said, "Looks like dad's here Ma."

"Yes I can see that" was all she could muster.

She strode in through the front door; walked over to the babies and kissed them both. She turned to Gillian, "Hi, how's everything been today?" completely ignoring John.

Gillian looked at Caroline and then John. "It's er been fine, they've been fine, Kate's having a nap."

"No she's not, she's up and ecstatic to see her wife home from work." Kate shouted a she came down the stairs; walking over to Caroline and kissing her as passionately as she felt she could in public.

"How are you darling?" Caroline asked as she let go of her.

"We've all had a good day; these two seem to love their aunty Gillian," nodding towards the babies.

Caroline looked at Gillian, "I suppose John is in the house at your invitation?"

"Well not really, he sort of invited himself; he said he was early to pick up Lawrence." She felt rather defensive about that insinuation.

Caroline turned to her son as he rummaged through the fridge. "Lawrence did you tell your father I was going back to work today?"

"I might have, he was asking me all kinds of questions."

"Did you also tell him that Gillian would be helping with the babies?"

Before he could answer, she turned her gaze to John. "God you are so transparent. Lawrence hurry up love and get changed, I think dad might be in a hurry, I can't think why else he would be so early."

Kate could barely conceal the grin she felt forming. She was always amazed at how quick witted Caroline was and how she could deliver a damaging blow with so few words. She thanked god she had rarely been on the receiving end of it.

Lawrence left the room. "Now look here Caroline, you can't treat me like this. I have right to see my family."

She said nothing; just stared at him.

Kate seized her moment. "John seems to think, from what he said to Gillian, that you've got yourself lumbered with twin babies and it's a crazy mess that you probably wish you weren't in."

Gillian looked at the floor and said nothing. Caroline walked over to John and stood in his space. "This is why you can never be trusted, drunk or sober. You are hell bent on causing trouble. Fortunately for me I have a beautiful wife who knows that I adore my two daughters, my life was only ever a mess with you and if anyone or anything is crazy it's you. Now I suggest you wait for your son in the car. In future you can pick him up straight from school. Now leave and don't come back."

John knew there was no sense in protesting and simply walked out, looking at Caroline with a sinister glare.

Gillian left after ten minutes and Lawrence took off with John. His mother always had a niggling fear that her son was not altogether safe in the care of his father, but for his sake she needed to keep that to herself.

"Listen," Kate said softly. "No sound except the gentle breathing of the babies. We haven't had this stillness since I came home; it's just you and me." They each carried a baby up the stairs and put them in the nursery. Caroline took off her work clothes and lay on the bed next to Kate. It was indeed a rare moment of aloneness. Caroline kissed the top of her wife's head and stroked her face.

"I'm sorry if he hurt you Kate, you must know that I don't feel that way at all."

"I do, but he can still churn me up sometimes with the things he says and implies. You were magnificent, the way you handled him." Kate chuckled as she said it.

They both knew as they lay soaking up the solitude and calm, these moment would be rare until the twins were able to sleep longer at night. Kate's stitches were healing well and she whispered that it wouldn't be long before they could resume their love making. After William, Caroline had taken three weeks to heal up, a fact that had caused John to get very restless and frustrated. What a contrast she thought, she could never conceive of hurrying Kate or making her feel guilty. She knew it would be more than worth the wait when they were able to.

"Caroline, I've been thinking, how would you feel if we organise a naming day celebration for the twins?"

"Sure, I'm fine with that, what did you have in mind?"

"Well just a simple ceremony with a celebrant and all our family and close friends. We would have to think of Godparents and choose who we want for that. Then there's the question of Greg."

"What about Greg?" Caroline asked quizzically.

"Well remember when I phoned him to tell him about their birth, he did ask if it would be possible to see them; what do you think?"

"Wow, well that's a can of worms Kate. I thought you said he was never going to be part of the equation."

"I did yes, but you know Caroline, you and I are so secure with each other and our babies' birth certificates have your name as parent, I don't think we have anything to fear from him."

"Can I think about it for a while?"

Kate nodded in agreement and let the matter drop for the moment. Caroline however was transported back to the night in the hotel for Kate's birthday. It was a memory that still haunted her, especially if she felt vulnerable in any way. She had seen a steely determination in Kate that quite shocked her. Greg had come across as a complete jerk, with verbal diarrhoea. It had not occurred to her at the time that this was his expression of nervousness, until Kate explained that to her only recently.

"He's a really decent man Caroline. If anything he comes across as an idiot and socially awkward, but he's really quite a simple and sincere man. He's true to his word and would never do anything to hurt me."

After a few days of discussion they agreed on a naming ceremony. Kate asked if Issy could be one of the 'godparents' as they had decided to call them, despite not being religious they both felt more comfortable with the traditional term. There had been lots of discussing and pros and cons, eventually deciding on Issy and William for Flora and Greg and Gillian for Grace. Kate had invited Greg to come over for dinner the coming weekend to discuss it with him.

The decision to involve Greg had not come easily for Caroline. On some days in her mind, he was just a jerk, but on her worst days she could only think of the pain she had felt knowing that Kate was in bed having sex with him, that Saturday night she had left the hotel. She would just have to trust Kate that it wasn't going to end up in a catastrophe.

Issy was over the moon to be asked and the date for the naming had been set for two months time, to accommodate her weekend off. She too was coming this weekend to see the babies and her beloved Katie.

Saturday came around quickly, almost too quickly for Caroline. She knew it could be hard for her on a couple of scores but she was determined to be open to them both. It helped that the night before, knowing that Caroline was tense; Kate had felt ready for some gentle love making and reconnecting. It was glorious and wonderful and Caroline took great comfort from it for today.

At two o'clock Kate opened the door as she heard a car pull up in the driveway. She ran outside and into the open arms of Issy. They hugged each other for some moments and then Issy let go and hurried over to Caroline.

"Caroline, it's so good to see you both. Thanks for inviting me up, I'm so looking forward to seeing the babies."

They went indoors and not two minutes later there was a whimpering follow by a full blown cry as one of them woke up. "That's probably Gracie, she usually wakes up first and sets her sister off." Caroline said over her shoulder as she started up the stairs to fetch her.

"You go up with her Issy and bring the other one down." Issy kissed Kate on the forehead, "You're still very beautiful." And then took off after Caroline.

The three women spent the next couple of hours talking and laughing, sharing all their news. Lawrence came home from Rugby during this time, with Angus. "Ma, OK if Angus stays over?"

"Of course is it."

Then, as naturally as it was becoming for him, he turned to Kate; "Ok with you too Kate? I know you've got friends here."

"Lawrence I'm more than happy, in fact I'd like you two to meet Issy, my very dear friend who's up from London for the weekend."

The boys shook hands with her and then cleared off into Lawrence's bedroom, not before having a look at the babies and rubbing their little fingers.

At four thirty there was the sound of another set of wheels in the driveway. Kate said, "Oh that will be Greg," and walked outside to greet him. Moments later they walked through the door, Greg was ushered over to the twins and he took his time picking each of them up and cuddling them. He looked first at Kate and then Caroline; "Thank you," he mouthed.

His eyes then turned to Issy. Kate saw something in them as he looked at her, that she had seen herself twenty years earlier.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter Thirteen

Kate lay looking up at the filtered moonlight bathing them through the window of their hotel room. Her eyes then rested on the bare shoulders and tousled hair of her sleeping wife; a testament to the passion they had shared a few hours before; their wedding night. She felt her fingers caressing the ring Caroline had so reverently put on yesterday, promising to love her forever; it was more than overwhelming.

"Caroline, Caroline"

"Mm"

"I love you."

"I know Mrs McKenzie- Dawson. I love you too. Why are you awake?"

"I'm too excited to sleep; I can hardly believe it's all happened."

"Well it has, and I feel like I've come home at last." turning on to her side and wrapping her body around Kate. "Sleep now darling, it's our night without babies. I need your batteries charged up again for the morning." Kate smiled nestling back into Caroline's body and letting her eyes close.

Granny Celia and Nanna Ginika were on baby duty for the weekend, but they were still too small to leave for more than one night.

Their decision to combine the naming ceremony with their wedding had led to a frenzy of activity, as if they hadn't enough to do looking after two babies. But both women were so sure this is what they wanted, to be married, and to do it as soon as possible. The hard choices had been faced, confirming that they would do anything for each other, and to be together.

Greg had become a regular visitor to the house. Caroline was warming to him and found it sweet that he was a natural with the babies. He was protective and supportive but he constantly reminded them, particularly Caroline that he would always honour his agreement and not interfere with their parenting and decision making; It was enough for him to be in their lives as they grew up. One day, she had walked in on him talking to them and she heard him call himself 'daddy'. Strangely, it felt very right. He was such a contrast to John; he didn't need to continuously promote himself and he certainly didn't rely on alcohol to get through the day. Lawrence enjoyed his visits; he had been massively impressed to find out that Greg was the guy who illustrated his favourite comics; they often discussed possible plotlines. Caroline was glad he had a stable male role model in his life.

On one visit, he had pulled Kate to one side and told her that he had a business trip to London and did she think Issy would mind if he contacted her. She had pinched his cheek and told him she was 'on to him'. Issy had welcomed his visit and they seemed to be getting on very well. Suddenly he began to have more meetings in the capital than he had in the last two years put together.

"Kate, do you think Greg is falling for Issy?" Caroline asked one day.

"Well I've seen that look in his eyes, like three hundred years ago, and there's no mistake I think."

"But isn't Issy into women? Won't she give him false hope? You know he's growing on me and I wouldn't want either of them to get hurt."

Kate thought for a moment and then said, "I remember her telling me that she was happy either way; and she said when the right person came along, gender wouldn't be an issue, love would. I don't think she's had any really long term relationships but there have been a couple of strong ones, me of course, and then there was a doctor at one the hospitals she worked at, but he turned out to be married; that hurt her a lot."

"Wow, well I hope she's knows what she's doing here."

"They're grownups Caroline, we can only hope. They both deserve someone wholesome and who loves them."

"God it would feel a bit incestuous if they did get together, don't you think? I mean with the babies."

"Life's complicated Caroline we of all people know that. It is what it is and all I care about, beyond the two of them, is all our children having good people in their lives."

With that they had let it go. It would be interesting to see them both at the celebration.

Caroline had gone to see her mother alone to tell her about the wedding. They had spoken to Ginika and she was very happy for them and glad it was all happening at the same time. However, despite Celia appearing to be happy with everything, Caroline knew there was the ever present possibility that she would initially have something negative to say. It was better all round if Kate didn't hear it.

"Hello love, this is nice, you just popping round, we don't see you that often these days."

"No, I know, I'm sorry, it's just that life is very busy now, we are just lucky you're close by."

Alan came in from the garden and they all sat down to have a cuppa.

"I've come to tell you both something. You know how we are preparing for the naming ceremony, well Kate and I have decided, that because everyone will already be here, we are going to get married at the same time."

There was a significant enough pause for Caroline to feel worried, then Alan came over to her, "Well that's a smashing idea love, congratulations." and kissed Caroline on the cheek. Celia took a perceptible deep breath, "Yes, that's lovely."

She continued to look at Caroline. "What are you going to do about your career?"

"What do you mean mum?"

"Well they'll not be best pleased to have a headmistress who's married to another woman will they? Why can't you just keep your private life separate? "

"Well firstly, a lot of staff already knows that Kate and I are together. Secondly I am a bloody good head and they wouldn't want to lose me, and thirdly, they are not allowed to discriminate against same sex couples especially if they are married."

"No maybe in theory, but they might make life difficult for you."

"Mum, I can do difficult believe me. I'm not going to be ashamed of my wife; Kate will always come first even if I had to get another position, which I won't."

Celia knew Caroline well enough not to pursue this any further, it was inevitable and so she had just better go with it. She couldn't openly admit it yet but she could see how happy Caroline was and it was comforting.

"Where will you have it love?" Alan asked, wanting to move the conversation along.

"You know how there's the large common lawn between our barn and the one on the other side? Well our neighbours are lovely people and have agreed to let us put up a marquee there. That way the weather won't be an issue and the caterers can use our kitchen."

Kate and Caroline had become quite good friends with their neighbours, a couple about their age with two children, ten and eight. Their little girl was entranced by the twins and would come to see them as often as her mother would let her. They would of course be invited to the celebration.

"So, it's all organised?" Celia asked."

"Well we're getting there. Kate's been amazing really, she gets on to the organisation when the girls are asleep and on the days when Gillian's there, she's such a great help for Kate, I think it's working out well."

There were two days to go. Caroline had taken the week off school to help with the final preparations. They had ended up with a guest list of about sixty.

"God Kate, I didn't know we knew so many people between us, it's not like either of us have a massive extended family." Apart from the small family group, they had invited a few close colleagues and old friends from Durham and Oxford. Beverley was beside herself with excitement and quietly credited herself with aiding the relationship. She was totally devoted to Caroline and Kate was the one who had pulled her boss out of her misery. She would often bring something to work for the babies. One day she had turned up with two little 'onsies', both green, and Caroline had reminded her of the colour coding; to which Beverley had just rolled her eyes to heaven.

Ginika had arrived from the USA and Issy was due that evening, having been able to add a couple of extras to her days off. Kate was hoping that the two of them didn't get into too much detail about how she knew Issy. Even with her own mother, there were things better left unsaid.

Their house was now full as William and Roxy were home too.

In bed that night Caroline looked lost in her thoughts. "What are you thinking?" Kate asked.

"I'm just comparing my life now with what it was like even just eighteen months ago. I realise that even though I loved the actual house, there were so many times when it wasn't a particularly happy place. I guess the happy buzz of this place just brings it home." Kate adored her vulnerable and gentle Caroline.

The big day arrived. Kate couldn't believe how nervous she was, Caroline had spotted it earlier and organised William and Roxy to take over getting the babies fed and dressed and hopefully asleep before it all started. Caroline leant into the cot, "Now Gracie, mummy wants you to be a good girl and not set your sister off." The baby looked up at her and smiled.

Cars started to arrive around half past two, at three the ceremony would start with the wedding and after a glass of champagne and canapés, the naming. The marquee looked amazing and the caterers had pulled out all the stops to put on something special. The celebrant was herself a gay woman and between the three of them they had come up with a lovely ceremony for both the wedding and naming.

This was it. "I Katherine Abike McKenzie take you Caroline Elizabeth Dawson to be my wife." Kate had said these words before in a different context, as had Caroline, but her heart was in a whole other place today, it felt surreal. The tenderness both women expressed as they exchanged their vows and promised a lifetime of love and care for each other was palpable to those in the room. Because all of their guests were close to them there was hardly a dry eye in the house.

The celebrant pronounced them spouses for life and as they kissed there was an explosion of applause, nice in itself, but it set Gracie off who in turn woke Flora causing everyone to laugh.

After the drinks, they sat down again for the naming. The four godparents, the two grandmothers and Lawrence were at the front. Kate and Caroline both held a baby. The celebrant asked the godparents to read out a promise to care for the two girls in all the circumstances of their life and to support their parents in bringing them up. Caroline had asked Lawrence to join in this promise as well. The two grandmothers lit a candle as each of their names was being read out. Then everyone was invited to come and give them either a blessing or wish them well. Both babies were awake, but content in their mothers' arms.

The meal and celebration continued with all the trimmings. Instead of formal speeches, William had simply opened the floor for people to say something. Caroline shot a sideways look at him as he certainly hadn't run this past her! Some people gave heartfelt little speeches and others were very witty and took all kinds of liberties, especially about Caroline and work. Both women felt very loved and special. There had been one rather funny but also poignant speech from Issy, she shared lots of stories about 'flatting' as she referred to it, with Kate but as she digressed into what a beautiful and special person she was, her eyes filled with tears. Clearly, it was not completely over for her yet. Greg very discretely slid his arm around her shoulder.

As soon as they felt it was remotely possible and polite, the married couple made their farewells, kissed their babies and hopped into Kate's car which to their embarrassment had been duly decorated. Kate drove until they were out of sight and came to the first concealed pullover spot. She hopped out and removed the tin cans and placards trailing from the back bumper. As she got back into the car she felt Caroline's arms fold around her, followed by a searing kiss which said everything.

They had chosen a small country hotel to stay for the night, not too far away. They were warmly welcomed and shown to the bridal suite. There was a bucket of champagne in the room and some chocolates. Caroline poured them both a glass and they sat together on the lounge.

"To you my darling wife, I'm the happiest woman alive." Caroline chinked her glass against Kate's. "Not so fast you, I think I might be." Kate said as she pulled Caroline towards her. Neither of them could have imagined not so long ago, that this would be their new life.

The moonlight over their bed was replaced by bright sunlight as Caroline stirred and looked over at her wife. Like Kate, she was overwhelmed with feelings.

"Kate, Kate"

"Mm"

"I love you"

"I know Mrs McKenzie Dawson. I love you too. Why are you awake?"

There was no more conversation, and no more sleep.


	14. Final Chapter

Final Chapter

 ** _Here I leave our lovely couple, happy, contented and ready for all that life will throw at them. Thanks so much for all your kind reviews, PMs and suggestions._**

"Caroline, where are you going? You've just passed our turn off."

"There's something I want to show you, be patient."

She drove towards Sulgrave. She'd already phoned Beverley to make sure everything was finished for her surprise. Ten minutes later she pulled into the entrance of the school.

"Caroline, you're not; the day after our wedding and you're coming to the office!"

Caroline stopped the car and turned off the engine. "No I'm not going to my office; this is as far as I need to go today. Just look and see."

It took Kate a few seconds before she noticed the official entrance sign. It was completely new. But the most obvious change was the name of the headmistress.

Dr Caroline E. McKenzie-Dawson.

Kate put her hand on Caroline's thigh, stroking her, "When did this happen?"

"I got it fixed while I was on leave last week. I felt it was like the last thing I needed to do to be proud of who we are."

They pulled into their drive about half an hour later than they had planned. The family were putting on a BBQ brunch for all the guests that were still around and anyone who wanted to come; about thirty people were standing around. Caroline could feel herself starting to blush as she got out of the car; she wondered if their guests would notice the wide smile on her face and speculate why it was there. Check out at the hotel was ten o'clock, they'd only just made it and her body was still revelling in the highs they'd reached.

Seeing the blush, Celia walked up to her daughter with Flora in her arms; "You've got a smirk on your face, honestly Caroline, you're forty six, not twenty six."

"Yep, forty six, madly in love and have just had the most awesome wedding night and I might add, morning." Her mother was not going to rain on her parade today. Celia handed the baby to her and shook her head as she walked off. Caroline looked over to see Ginika go up to Kate and kiss her forehead, she saw her whisper something and her daughter turn very coy. What a contrast. Kate took Gracie from her mother and walked over to Caroline. "What's up with Celia?"

"Sex, in a nutshell. She thinks my smile is broadcasting that we had a wonderful wedding night, which it is; she's embarrassed and concerned because there are school people here. Apparently, my career is in jeopardy because I've married another woman." Kate just shook her head."Well your mother is never boring I'll say that for her. Come on, let's go and mingle, don't let it bother you."

Celia walked over to the other guests. Beverley sidled up to her. "Hello Celia, I don't know if you remember me, I'm Caroline's PA.?"

"Oh yes, I remember you Beverley isn't it?"

Beverley nodded in the direction of the newly married couple. "Aren't they lovely? I've been worried about Caroline, she's dear to me and it's been hard to see her so miserable. Kate's wonderful and she brings out the best in her and now they have these gorgeous babies. They're perfect for each other."

"Aren't you worried that Caroline might have trouble with the Board, being married to another woman and all?" Celia questioned.

"God no! They wouldn't dare. I can't say that there aren't a couple of them that are narrow minded and might kick up a bit of a fuss but Gavin, the Chairman of the Board was at the wedding yesterday. He thinks the world of Caroline and is her greatest supporter. She's too valuable to lose, he knows that." Celia was more and more realising that she was fighting a losing battle and deep down was actually starting not to mind it too much.

Moments later, Lawrence and Angus called out to everyone to come and collect their BBQ and make their way into the marquee.

Caroline walked over to Gillian. "I've been meaning to say sorry to you about my comment the other day."

"What comment?" she knew perfectly well what Caroline was talking about but decided to string her out a little.

"About you inviting John into the house; I was furious with him and I took it out on you."

"Well he just pushed his way in as he does; he used to do that up at farm as well. He rang me you know, the day after. He was pissed off with you and wanted to talk to me about it. He asked if could come to the farm and I said no. After he'd finished ranting, he made another of his stupid comments about you realising you'd made a mistake and he'd need to be there to pick up the pieces. He just wants you back. I don't think he's ever going to give up Caroline."

"Christ, Gillian, he's so misguided! Look at me? Does he seriously think that I'd give up this and go back to him? Anyway it's not really me he wants, it's all the home comforts he's lost."

"Well he's lashing out isn't he? "

"Yes but it disturbs Kate and I won't stand for that; He's really stupid because if he behaved in an adult fashion he could possibly have more contact with us, but he's got both boys off side now with his drinking and ridiculous behaviour."

Unbelievably, just as Caroline was finishing the sentence, a familiar car pulled into the driveway. "Oh God no, please don't let him cause a scene today."

John got out of his car with a bunch of flowers and strode over to Caroline. Gillian made a quick exit. Kate noticed him out of the corner of her eye and felt sick in the stomach, now what.

"Caroline, I just came to say congratulations." He pushed a bunch of chrysanthemums in her face. God, couldn't he even remember that she hated the smell of them.

"Thank you; but what are you doing here. We have guests, many of whom don't know who you are and I would prefer to keep it that way."

"I just thought perhaps we could talk?"

"Today; are you mad? I'm in the middle of my wedding celebrations. You are the last person I want to talk to. Kate and I have family and friends that we need to be with. Now I'd appreciate it if after you have said hello to your sons, you would leave, quietly and without causing a fuss."

Robbie strode over to Caroline," What's this tosser doing here? Is he invited? Shall I get rid of him for you?"

"No it's OK thanks Robbie; John's leaving in a moment."

She then turned back to John, softening a little as she saw the pain in his face. "John, you are really going to have to get it into your head that you and I are completely over. I'm married now and there is absolutely no possibility in any universe that you can contemplate getting me back. All you are doing is upsetting all of us, especially Kate, and the boys are disgusted with your behaviour. Do you really want to keep on like this?"

"I've squandered everything that mattered. God, even Judith left me and went back to her family. I'm alone now and have hardly any friends left. I have no idea who to turn to."

"It's not rocket science John but it is hard, you're just going to have to sort your life out and work out how to get back on your feet and make up for all the shit you've caused. No one can do that for you. If and when you do, maybe we can talk then. I have to go now and so do you."

John looked in the direction of his two sons. Lawrence gave a half hearted wave mouthing "Hi Popsicle" William shook his head and walked out of his sight.

Kate came over and slid her hand into Caroline's. "Are you ok darling?" staring at John.

"It's ok Kate, I'm leaving. I won't cause any trouble." And with that he headed for his car and drove off.

"Caroline, please tell me this is the end of it?"

"I can only hope;" she sighed; Now he's gone I'd rather like you to put the grin back on my face." Kate kissed her gently and they walked back to the others.

Issy had seen the debacle. She was very concerned for Kate. She'd heard all about this idiot and how manipulative he was. She'd hoped that Caroline would have put a stop to all this before she and Kate got married but today she got a first -hand glimpse of how hard that would be.

Later when all their guests had left, it was just the family plus Greg and Issy left at the house. Ginika had gone home with Alan and Celia to have a bit of quiet time, looking after two tiny babies had taken its toll on the older women.

Caroline sidled up to Kate, "God I really want to take you to bed, one night wasn't enough."

Kate laughed, "Caroline we are back to reality now my darling. It's only lunch time, and we have to entertain our family and guests. Not to mention two little ones who will no doubt be bawling in the next couple of hours." Caroline sighed and nodded. "I want to spend a bit of time with Issy too; she's leaving soon and I've not really had a good chat." She wandered over and took Issy upstairs to the nursery where they could have some privacy.

"Katie, I saw what happened today with Caroline's ex. I thought you said she'd taken care of all that rubbish. I worry that not much has changed."

"Oh Issy if you only knew how much she has gone through to make it right for me, for us. There isn't much else she can do about John except keep giving him the same message. It's hard when there are kids involved." "I suppose so, as long as she keeps looking out for you.

Yesterday was beautiful Katie, I can see that you are really happy and it's been worth what you've been through. I can't say I didn't feel a bit overwhelmed, I suppose if the truth were told I'm still not quite over you, us, really. Greg and I are going to leave soon. I'm back at work on Tuesday and we want to spend some time alone before then, we have stuff to talk about."

"Can I ask how it's going?"

"So far, well. He's a silly but loveable fellow and I'm growing very fond of him. I think he would like things to move a little faster but that's what we need to talk about. Like you said about me Katie, I can't have him feel second best. I need more time to see if it will come to be the real thing. But in the meantime I like being with him."

"Has it, you know, progressed."

"Katie my love if you are asking me if I've slept with him, the answer is yes. That was a big test as you can imagine, and it was good, but not earth shattering, not yet."

Kate hugged her and wished with all her heart that it would work out for them. It was not lost on her that Issy was still wearing the bracelet she had given her.

"I must find him now as we need to be setting off. I'm going to stay at his place in Manchester tonight and then on to London tomorrow afternoon."

Caroline joined them in the drive as they got into their cars. They had made arrangements to all meet up in London in a couple of months , so they could spend time with the twins. Greg had shared with Kate that if things kept progressing well, he may consider relocating to there as he could work anywhere.

By the evening, all the guests had gone. Kate had driven her mother to the airport and William and Roxy were back in Oxford. Lawrence was in his room doing his homework and Caroline and Kate were upstairs giving the babies their last feed of the day.

It was always a wonder for Caroline to see Kate breastfeeding; knowing how much she had longed to be a mother; now here she was a mother twice over and loving every minute of it, hopefully with all the heartache behind her.

She lifted the now sleeping Gracie into her cot and wrapped her up and went to sit close to Kate stroking her face and kissing her and Flora.

"I'm going to bed now. I'll be waiting for you."

Ten minutes later, Kate climbed into bed and gently removed the reading glasses and book from a sleeping Caroline. Smiling she whispered so as not to wake her, 'you've got no stamina woman' and lay down beside her.

"Haven't I?" came a husky response as Caroline turned to her and picked up where they had left off at quarter to ten that morning.


End file.
